The Bonds We Choose
by Don't Call Me Angie
Summary: Harry is in his 6th year, all events till now are canon compliant, except that, in addition to Sirius's death in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, Harry has lost Hermione as well. This double loss, along with the emphasis on Voldemort's big return, has weighed Harry down. It is then that he meets Alexa McGonagall, who has secrets fate has decided it's time she shared.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:**

 **Description**

 **Harry is in his 6th year, all events till now are canon compliant, except that, in addition to Sirius's death in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, Harry has lost Hermione as well. This double loss, along with the emphasis on Voldemort's big return, has weighed Harry down. It is then that he meets Alexa McGonagall, who has secrets she's decided it's time to share.**

 **Disclaimer**

 **All the characters and the magical world belong to JK Rowling, except Alexa and her father, and any new original characters I may choose to add later. I do not intend to make money from this, only have fun writing.**

 **Chapter One**

There was an eerie silence at Platform nine and three quarters that September the first. The glances, and quite often, pointed stares, in Harry's direction had always been there, but this intensity had not. It was not without reason; after all, word about what happened at the Department of Mysteries had gotten out, and Harry was no longer being regarded as The Boy Who Lied, rather, he was worshipped again as The Boy Who Lived.

Besides, some of that intensity was also the fear nobody really wanted to acknowledge. Children held on a little tighter to their parents' hands, and the parents seemed a little more unwilling to let go. Voldemort was back.

Harry said goodbye to Mr and Mrs Weasley as he, Ron and Ginny boarded the train. He and Ron got into an empty compartment while Ginny, after a moment of hesitation, moved on ahead.

Harry looked at the parchment his fingers were still gripping tightly, and he reread the words he'd been rereading the past month.

 _Harry, Harry, Harry_

 _If I know you at all, you're wracked with guilt right now. It pains you to see me like this, and it will hurt even more when I'm gone. I'm so sorry, Harry, I'm so sorry I have to go._

 _Harry I've known you for five years now, and you're my best and one of the oldest friends I've had. You've been there through everything and Harry honestly I'm glad for that._

 _Knowing you has been the greatest adventure of my life. From fighting trolls to fighting death, we've come such a long way, and you still have miles more to go. I know none of this is easy, and things are only waiting to get harder. I wish I could hold you and comfort you and just let you let it all out about how terrible everything is after Sirius...Harry. Harry, my brave, brave friend. It's okay not to be brave all the time._

 _Harry, be careful, please. Voldemort is back and it will not be long before he tries to hunt you down again. Trust Dumbledore, he knows what he's doing. Let him teach you as many spells as you need to learn. Keep your friends close, Harry. In the difficult times that lie ahead, it will not be easy for everybody to stand by you. Forgive them for that, Harry, because it is not always their fault. Let Voldemort be the only enemy._

 _Take care of Ron for me, will you? My parents said they would let me date when I was sixteen. I should have asked Ron out last September. This September is so far away and when it comes, I'll be so far away, won't I? I hope he'll be happy, Harry, and I hope you will be too, when all of this is over. When all the wars have been waged, and there is peace at last, I will still be there for you, for both of you, in your hearts._

 _Harry, I'll always be watching over you, shaking my head at your recklessness, beaming with pride at your bravery and love, and I wish I could go on with you on every arduous journey you must undertake. But my part is over._

 _I may have been the brightest witch of my age, but Harry, you're hands down the smartest person I've ever known, a great person to share a conversation with, a fierce friend, and an absolute gem of a person as a whole and, oh Harry, I love you so very much. I miss you already._

 _Goodbye Harry_

 _Love always_

 _Hermione_

 _PS in case I can't say it tomorrow, Happy Birthday!_

Harry folded the parchment.

During the Battle of the Department of Mysteries, when Harry had to keep fighting even though Sirius was dead and all he wanted was to sit and let the feeling of loss wash over him, Hermione got struck by a spell meant to kill her slowly, weakening her over time.

Hermione was in St Mungo's till the day of his sixteenth birthday. And then she died.

But before she left, she wrote letters for everyone she'd loved, giving them a night before she died. This was the letter Harry had been rereading. He knew Ron, so in love with Hermione still, slept with her letter under his pillow every night.

Harry looked up at Ron, who was staring out of the window with a stricken expression.

"Ron?"

"It's quiet, isn't it?"

Harry knew what he meant. Harry knew that in spite of the noise of the train chugging along, there was a silence in the air, the silence of no Hermione and Ron bickering, the silence of the absence of their laughter. This silence wasn't restricted to their compartment alone. All over the train, stillness had settled, and so had sombre faces.

"Is it alright if we join you?"

Harry looked up to see Ginny with Neville by her side, and nodded. Neville looked stronger, as though he'd been working out over the summer, and his chin had a determined set to it. He looked every bit the boy whose parents had been tortured for their bravery, and he looked every bit the son who was going to make his parents proud. He offered Harry the smallest smile, and then leaned in to give him the warmest hug.

As he sat beside Harry, and Ginny took a seat beside Ron, Harry caught Ginny's eye and quickly looked away. He pretended to read Hermione 's letter, but his thoughts took him back to his birthday.

 _Hermione had finally breathed her last, and as she lay there, Harry found himself walking away slowly. He couldn't bear to see her like that anymore._

 _"I'm going home," he said, to nobody in particular._

 _"Harry, wait," Ginny called out, but Harry was out of the room, and was on his way to Floo himself to the Burrow._

 _Ginny raced out and caught him at the fireplace._

 _"Harry Potter!"_

 _Harry cringed as everybody in the corridor turned to look at him. Ginny grabbed his hand as she announced, "I'm coming with you."_

 _Harry had no choice. They Flooed home and when they reached, neither knew what to say._

 _"Harry," Ginny began tentatively._

 _"I'm going to bed."_

 _Ginny bit her lip and nodded slowly. As his head hit the cool pillow and he felt his eyes close, he felt her warm hands gently run through his messy hair, ruffling it ever so slightly. His eyelids were getting heavier…_

 _When his eyes opened, it all came back to him in a rush, and the tears gushed out of his eyes faster than the memories could come to him._

 _He just sat in bed for a while, until he heard a knock. It was Ginny._

 _She slowly made her way to Harry, with a small birthday cake._

 _"She… She wanted you to have a cake for your birthday."_

 _Harry didn't feel like eating. He looked at the single candle and then looked again at Ginny._

 _"If my birthday wish was to have them all back, would it come true?"_

 _"Harry…"_

 _He took a bite of cake, then swallowed._

 _"Did she tell you to make it sugar free or did you just forget?"_

 _"She told me. She said... sugar would be bad for your teeth."_

 _He bit back a smile, simply shaking his head._

 _"We wanted to give you presents, we've kept them in the kitchen so you can take them when you're ready. Mum told me to tell you she made treacle tart. And um, the Grangers left a while back, they had to, er, discuss some things about the … funeral."_

 _She paused then said, "I'll… go then."_

 _Harry nodded. The word "funeral" was stuck in his head now._

 _"I'll be taking a shower."_

 _And he went into the bathroom, fully clothed, and turned on the tap and stood under the gushing water and let his own tears spill out._

 _The fatigue of the last few months caught up with him and the pain and loss made him fall to the floor in wracking sobs. The knocks on the door sounded as though from a distant universe, and he did not care when the door opened slightly._

 _"Harry I thought I heard you fall, is everyth- HARRY!"_

 _Ginny dropped to the floor and took Harry in her arms. She didn't know what to say, so she held him tight as her own tears fell, rubbing his back and stroking his hair._

 _And then she kissed him on the forehead, looking deep into his eyes,looking as though she was willing her eyes to tell his that it would get better, that she was there with him, that she was there for him._

 _And then her eyes dropped to his lips, and he saw that, and she opened her mouth slightly in embarrassment, when he captured her lips roughly. His kisses were insistent, passionate, and she was kissing him back, and he had slowly moved to her neck when they heard Mrs Weasley calling out Ginny's name. They stopped rather abruptly._

 _They looked at each other, Harry looking slightly bewildered, while Ginny tried to regain her composure. She turned off the tap, performed a quick Drying Charm on both of them and took Harry's hand as they emerged from the bathroom._

"Wrackspurt got you, Harry?"

It had to be Luna. Sure enough, he saw the familiar dirty blonde hair, and those eyes that had that faraway look.

"Hello, Luna. Er, yeah, I think it was Wrackspurts, yeah."

"Thought so," she replied, taking a seat next to Ginny. The compartment was beginning to feel a bit cramped.

"Harry could I speak with you for a bit outside, please?" Ginny asked Harry.

He nodded, getting to his feet. They walked in silence, until, miraculously, they found an empty compartment.

They sat down on opposite ends and looked at their hands. Then Ginny took a deep breath and asked, "What are we doing, Harry?"

Harry looked up at her. What exactly had they been doing? Over the summer, they'd grown close, and there'd been a lot of snogging after his birthday, but they'd never talked about it. That hadn't stopped him from thinking about it, and lately he had asked himself how he felt about it and he had no idea how to tell her.

"Ginny. You are… the most beautiful girl I've ever met, and you're funny, and you're charming and you're witty, and - Ginny, are you crying?"

"No," she said, wiping her tears. "It's just… I've wanted this for so long, I've been obsessed with you since I've known you exist, I've gotten to know you better over the years and I've wanted to snog you so much and now we snog but it… doesn't seem right?"

There was a pause.

"And you've just lost Sirius and Hermione, and everyone's leaving and here I am, can't even be happy after kissing Harry Potter and-"

"I feel the same way."

Ginny blinked.

"And it's maddening, because I can't stop thinking about you and it's not just friendship, it's so much more than that but kissing you feels so wrong and I don't know what I want and did I tell you I can't stop thinking about you?"

"Neither can I," Ginny said, holding back a smile.

There was another pause, longer than the first, with both of them smiling at each other, slightly confused, but relieved nonetheless at finally getting things off their chest.

"So, we're alright then? We're friends who can't stop thinking about each other? Do we leave it at that?"

"That sounds about right, yeah," laughed Harry, and as they rose to return to their friends, someone stopped outside their compartment.

"Alexa, hi!" said Ginny.

 **A/N:**

 **That was my first fanfiction, everyone! Hope you enjoyed! I don't know when I'll be able to update since my finals are approaching, but I promise I won't abandon this fic. Please read and review, would love to know what you liked and what I should change, constructive criticism always welcome. Love always ?**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:**

 **Thanks to everyone who's read, reviewed, favourited and followed, the encouragement was much needed!**

 **Disclaimer:**

 **Everything belongs to JK Rowling except Alexa, her Dad and subsequent original characters, if any.**

 **Chapter Two**

Harry's eyes glazed over to see whom Ginny had just greeted. He was surprised to see Professor McGonagall there, who seemed to be trying to placate the girl Ginny had just called Alexa.

"Alexa, it has to be done. You started a fire at my house, you ended up Flooing yourself to Malfoy Manor, and Merlin knows I don't need to remind you about the Death Eaters breaking into your house —"

"Min, I don't need a bodyguard!"

Harry raised his eyebrows. _Min_? He tried to catch Ginny's eye, but she seemed engrossed in the conversation.

"I'm not the only one in danger here, people are dying every day, the attacks aren't stopping, heck, if anyone needs a bodyguard, it's Harry bloody Potter!"

Harry's eyebrows moved higher.

"There's a madcap out there who's out for Harry Potter's blood but the wizarding world thinks it's perfectly alright to send him out to the front line and call him the _Chosen One_ , and if everybody stopped idolising him for just a moment they'd probably realise he's only sixteen!"

Harry bit back a smile. He, and everyone around him, had gotten so used to the idea of him being the saviour, that it was quite refreshing to see people like Alexa who still saw the injustice of the theft of what should have been a run of the mill adolescence. He liked her already.

"This is not about Harry, Alexa, this is about _you_. Goodness knows how much longer your father will be stuck at St Mungo's, and I'm sure he'd like to see his daughter well and alive when he's out."

Harry began to feel slightly uncomfortable. This wasn't a conversation they should be eavesdropping upon. McGonagall and Alexa didn't even know Harry and Ginny were listening in, it had to stop. He wondered if he should announce himself.

"Your father is in St Mungo's and your mother is dead. Don't you go about being reckless and letting it all be in vain. You're all I have left, Alexa, and you know it. Perhaps you're right, and a bodyguard _would_ draw more attention to you, so I'll hold off on the letter to the Ministry for an Auror. But let me let it be known that this is no longer the time to be running off irresponsibly towards danger— that's something you would do well to remember, too, Mr Potter," McGonagall finished, turning to Harry at last. Harry's face turned warm. He looked up at Alexa who seemed unfazed by the fact that he'd been listening in. She stared coolly at him till he looked away.

"Er, yes, Professor. I'll - I'll keep that in mind, definitely."

"That's good to hear. And it's always a pleasure to have you back, Mr Potter," McGonagall continued warmly.

Harry gave her a small smile.

"Min, you can move on ahead. I'm staying here. It's final."

McGonagall pursed her lips, then, looking ahead, went on, "Well, I have an announcement to make.

 _Sonorus_.

Welcome to Hogwarts, dear students. Well, almost, as we still have about an hour left here. Well, we all know that Voldemort is back, yes, Voldemort, so I'm not going to beat about the bush here — dark times are ahead of us, and we at Hogwarts are doing everything we can to keep you safe, which includes the ride to Hogwarts. We have two teachers on the train, myself at the front and Professor Sprout at the back, in the event that things go wrong. If you find anything suspicious, you know where to find us. We hope you have a great year ahead of you, and that your families remain safe."

She reversed the _Sonorus_ spell and, giving Alexa a final look, moved ahead.

"What's she going to do when the Death Eaters come? Turn into a cat and scratch them with her paws?"

Harry, Ginny and Alexa turned to see Pansy Parkinson, Draco Malfoy, Blaise Zabini, Vincent Crabbe and Gregory Goyle snickering away in their compartment. Well, Malfoy wasn't snickering, which surprised Harry. He waited for Malfoy to add a dumb comment, but it was Zabini who complained, "Why couldn't we have Snape, that'd have been way cool."

Before Harry or Ginny could get a word in, Alexa had opened her mouth to retort, "Oh, probably because he's with the blasted Death Eaters already, haven't you heard?"

Then she turned to Pansy, gripped her wand tightly and, barely trying to control herself, said, "Don't worry your face over Death Eaters, Parkinson, they're not going to waste their time on you Slytherins. Oh, and that part about cats? Well they bite. And their grand nieces can hex you into oblivion, so watch it."

"Oh reall—"

"It's not worth it."

Harry was startled, as were the others, to hear Draco Malfoy say that. Harry peered at Malfoy, wondering whether it was due to just the fact that Malfoy's father was in Azkaban, or something else. It wasn't every day that Malfoy looked so subdued, or passed up a chance to be snarky.

"Leave it," muttered Ginny. Then she looked at Harry and asked, "Would you like to sit here only? I think I'll stay on here with Alexa."

"Sure."

Harry watched Alexa get into the compartment. She was a tiny thing, probably barely five feet tall, but he wasn't one to judge. Just 5'4" himself, he'd stopped caring about his height the minute he realised he was Harry Potter, whose job was to save the world. He'd realised inner strength was what mattered, and Alexa sure could take care of herself.

"Harry, this is Alexa McGonagall, Professor McGonagall's grand niece. She's in my year and one of my- well, now, my best friend," she stuttered at the last bit, obviously remembering Hermione.

That explains " _Min_ ", thought Harry.

"And Alexa, this is Harry, of course."

"Of course," said Alexa gently. She had a rather calm voice, the kind that could spew out the harshest words in the most beautiful way.

As they stood smiling slightly at each other, Harry took in her appearance. She was small, with wide, round eyes (which he would later learn were blue), wavy dark hair that barely skimmed her shoulders, and a slender physique. She wasn't pretty in the Ginny way, but she had that effortless manner about her. She didn't have perfect skin (he saw a couple of scars), her teeth were mostly even except for a slight gap between two teeth, and they weren't as unflinchingly white as Gilderoy Lockhart's had been. But she had an easy, winning smile, and brought a certain calmness to the air.

They sat down, after a moment.

"How come I never knew McGonagall had relatives?" asked Harry.

"I know right? When I came here I half expected to find a Chocolate Frog with my picture on one of the cards, that's how popular I thought I was. Alas, no luck. Yet. Still looking."

Before Harry could reply, Alexa went on, "Do you follow football?"

"Er, no, I —"

"It's so much like Quidditch, I love it. I went with Dad to see a match over the summer, it was beautiful. I missed the broomsticks though, definitely."

Harry looked at her with interest. Quidditch was definitely a passion of his. He'd been given the post of Captain, and while he knew he didn't have it in him to play for the team, not this year, he knew he'd like to coach the team. And Alexa looked spunky and like she meant business when it came to Quidditch.

"Oh, do you play then?"

"Just a little, over the summer, with some of my friends who live near Min's. But I like to think I'm phenomenal."

 _Here's a girl who definitely loves herself_ , thought Harry to himself, grinning.

"What position?"

"I'm a Keeper."

"Oh," was all Harry could say. He hoped she wasn't better than Ron then. If Ron lost his spot on the team, on top of everything else that was going on, he didn't think his best friend had it in him to deal with it.

"Mhm. Dad always used to tell me I look like the Chaser type, but I'm not the go-after-what-I-want kind of girl. Blocking someone else's path, stopping them in their tracks, breaking their hearts, that's more my style."

Alexa saw the look Ginny gave her, then grinned and said, "Kidding!" But Harry could tell from the glint in her eyes that she wasn't.

Harry liked how the conversation was going. Sure, she may seem a little overwhelming. A little too talkative. Overconfident. Just a little. She was what his Dad had probably been like in school. For the first time in so long, there wasn't a conversation about his latest encounter with Voldemort, or his next plan of action, or a discussion about a nightmare, or about somebody dying. There were no condolences, only laughter. There was something so raw and unabashed and unapologetic about Alexa, about that moment, that Harry stopped himself from telling Alexa he was sorry her father was in St Mungo's.

As Harry lost himself in his reverie, Alexa chattered on with Ginny. Then, her face grew sullen as she said, "Min wants me to get a bodyguard."

"Yeah, what was that all about?" asked Ginny.

"Oh, you know, I've sort of been battling death ever since —"

There was a long pause.

"Do you lot think Min's getting lonely out there?"

"Um," said Harry, wondering what to say. He'd never thought of his teachers and the concept of loneliness in the same context. Besides, he knew Alexa was hiding something. What was it?

"I think I'll go check up on her," said Alexa, jumping from her seat, magically sending her luggage to McGonagall' compartment.

Just before she left the compartment, she gave a half smirk to Harry.

"You aren't the only one who can have secrets around here."

And she was gone.

Harry laughed. It was probably the first time he'd laughed since Hermione and Sirius had died. Next to him, Ginny was smiling too, and shaking her head.

The rest of the train journey was rather uneventful, as Harry and Ginny just looked out of the window in silence, getting up to change as the Hogsmeade station neared. When the train came to a stop, they met Ron, Neville and Luna, and walked out towards the carriages together.

"Oh, no," muttered Ron.

As Harry looked up, Ginny grabbed his arm. "Are those - those are Thestrals aren't they?"

Harry exchanged a look with Luna. He just nodded at Ginny. He'd been able to see Thestrals since last year, and Neville and Luna always had, but his heart went out to Ginny and Ron, for whom the loss of Hermione must have sunk in fully only then, as they finally saw the winged horses that carried the carriages on their backs.

They got into a carriage and made their way to the castle in silence.

In the Great Hall, Harry and his friends saw a line of nervous first years waiting to be sorted. The smell of delicious food filled the air. Dumbledore had his usual warm, welcoming, knowing smile. Everything was the same. But nothing was.

All of a sudden, Ginny bit her lip and smiled.

"What is it, Ginny?" asked Harry curiously. Merlin knew he needed a reason to smile right then.

"Oh, it's just - in my first year, when you and Ron had that whole flying Ford Anglia fiasco and were late, she was all by herself and I'd just been sorted into Gryffindor and she bossily told me I could sit with her and she appeared to be all kind and as though she didn't want me to get lonely but I knew something was up. And then when I told her I was your sister, she launched into this whole thing about how irresponsible you two were and how she couldn't believe you were late to Hogwarts and by the end of it she just signed and said, 'Oh those boys, how I miss them.'"

Harry felt his chest tighten. He didn't know what to say. As they sat down, Harry saw Alexa and a few other fifth years gesture to Ginny. Ginny looked torn.

"Go."

She was still hesitant, but she left. Harry was glad. Alexa would be good for Ginny.

 _And for me too_ , he thought, colouring ever so slightly.

Dumbledore finished his speech, and the Prefects led the way to the common rooms. Gryffindor's new Prefects were Dean Thomas and Parvati Patil, and Harry struggled to not remember Ron and Hermione as the same.

They told the Fat Lady the password, then went to their good old four poster, crashing into bed at once.

Trying to sleep, Harry remembered the countless late night conversations he and Ron had had about whether or not Hermione liked Ron back, the thrilling nights where he'd happily read a letter from Sirius. He was trying to move ahead, but all the memories kept tugging at him, begging to be reexamined, one by one.

Harry wondered just how he was going to get through the next year and then he remembered Ginny's anecdote.

His last thought before sleeping was, _oh Hermione, how I miss you._


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer:**

 **Everything you recognise belongs to JK Rowling. Alexa and her dad are mine, as are subsequent original characters, if any.**

 **Chapter Three**

The first two weeks were not easy for Harry by any means. Classes were hectic, homework was piling up, his timetable was always full, and Hermione's seat was always empty.

Ginny had started spending more time with her fifth year friends, and Harry hardly saw Alexa – the few times he did, it had never been the time or place for meaningful conversation to be had or confidences to be shared.

Ron, in the meantime, was gradually withdrawing deeper and deeper into his shell. He hardly spoke to Harry, or anybody, for that matter, at mealtimes, and used lessons and homework as excuses later, but it wasn't hard to tell that he wasn't paying attention to his lessons, or that his homework was going undone. If there was nothing to be done, he'd go straight to bed. He hadn't touched his Wizarding chess pieces in ages, and his broomstick lay forgotten.

Harry was worried. He knew death wasn't easy to move past, but Ron's condition looked bad. He'd tried talking to him several times, but after a point, dejected, Harry gave up.

He was lonely.

He made his way up to the Owlery to meet Hedwig. He didn't have anybody to write to, or anybody who wrote to him, so he hadn't interacted much with his snowy owl in a while. He gently stroked her, remembering how happy he'd been to get her as his eleventh birthday gift from Hagrid.

A moment later, as she took off into the air to perhaps join another owl, Harry knew what he needed. Quidditch.

At the end of the first week, he'd told Madam Hooch about his intentions to be more Coach than Captain for the Gryffindor team. He'd told her he'd like to play the first match against Slytherin, but that would be it. She'd agreed. He was to hold tryouts a week later, and the first match would be in November, against Slytherin, as it always was.

He looked forward to it.

* * *

"Ron, come on! I booked the Quidditch pitch so we could practice together! Tryouts are in a week! You do want to play, don't you?"

"Harry, I can't. I-I just can't, Harry. I'm not feeling like it."

"But Ron, you used to love Quidditch!"

"Look, Harry, I said I don't want to go, okay? Why can't you just leave me alone? Why is everybody always suffocating me, trying to get me to talk, treating me as if something's the matter with me?"

"Because something _is_ the matter with you, Ron! You're not the only one who lost Hermione, we all did, but you seem to be the worst affected!"

"Harry, I'm fine! I swear, I can't seem to say it enough. Ginny was after me yesterday, Luna keeps telling me about Wrackspurts and even Neville keeps checking in with a 'You alright there, mate?' and I promise, the next time one of you asks, I'm going to —"

"Save it, Ron. I'll go."

And with that, Harry left the Common room, storming off to the portrait hole in a huff. Once outside, dejected, he leaned against the wall. The Fat Lady looked like she wanted to say something to him, but before she could, the door opened and Ginny appeared.

"Oh, Harry, he's gotten worse, hasn't he?"

"You heard?"

"Yeah, I was just getting down the dormitory stairs. Harry—everyone's different. Just because we're trying to put this behind us doesn't mean we shouldn't let Ron grieve in his own time. Some people take longer than the others, and we should respect that."

Harry sighed. "Maybe I shouldn't be so harsh on him. Maybe I need to give him space. But it's just that —"

"You're lonely, Harry, aren't you? You miss Hermione and Sirius, and now you miss Ron."

Harry just nodded.

"I'm sorry."

Harry frowned. "Why?"

"For leaving you to deal with this on your own. Can I go with you for Quidditch? I'd like to practise a bit before tryouts, I'm afraid you'll be harsh on me just so that you don't look lenient."

Harry smiled and the two of them went to the pitch.

* * *

After finishing a gruelling session of Quidditch, trying different dives and techniques, Harry and Ginny just sat on the ground for a bit.

"What's she like, Ginny? Alexa, I mean. What's she like?"

Ginny smiled faintly. "Someone's got a little crush, eh?" she teased.

Harry grinned. Then, quite honestly, he said, "Well, yeah, I did have a bit of a crush on her for the first two days, you know."

Ginny punched him playfully on the arm. "Forgotten me already, have you?"

Harry laughed.

"She's amazing. She's funny, she's cute, but I think I like her best because she somehow just always knows what kind of an atmosphere people need at that moment. And no matter what, her voice is just so soothing. It's almost like it puts you to sleep. In a good way, I mean. Like she puts all our bad thoughts to rest. Do I make sense?"

Harry nodded. Ginny tore a blade of grass before continuing, "She's one of the most genuine people I've ever met. She's brave, and she doesn't ever let anything get her down. And she can sure give it back to Slytherins. She's a tiny thing, but boy is she fierce."

Harry remembered a line from Shakespeare that he'd once read. "Though she be but little, she is fierce." It could certainly apply to Alexa.

"I'd like to be friends with her."

"I'm sure she'd like that too. Why don't you talk to her?"

"I only see her in passing and it's never the right time."

"It never will be. Try today, okay? She usually hides out in the library. Oh- I forgot to tell you. She's almost as big a library person as Hermione was. She's almost always there."

"Thanks."

This was followed by a long, comfortable silence, both lost in their worlds.

"Do you think we'll ever be okay, Harry? Will all these ghosts of our past ever stop following us? Riddle, Hermione, Sirius, all the stuff you've had to deal with- will it ever end?"

"I hope it does, it's the reason I'm going on."

Ginny nodded in understanding.

"And Ron? Will he get better?"

"Of course he will, Gin, what kind of a question is that?"

Ginny was quiet. They watched the sun go down. It was time to go back to the castle. They walked back wrapped up in their thoughts again.

They gave the Fat Lady the password, and when they entered the Common Room, Ron called out from the other end of the room, "Did they mean nothing to you? Did _she_ mean nothing to you?"

Harry looked at Ron, his brow furrowing in confusion. Ron was walking towards them, his voice getting louder and the words trembling with rage.

"Her body was still cold, but you didn't care did you? You didn't care that she died because of you, because _you_ couldn't save her. All you wanted was to snog my sister senseless."

"Ron—"

"Save it, Ginny. I saw you two come out of the bathroom with your lips all swollen that day - I'm not a fool, I know what it means! Did you hear me? I SAID, I'M NOT A FOOL!"

"Nobody thinks you're a fool, Ron—"

"And I saw you two sneaking away all summer, and even now you can't pass up a chance to put your hands all over her, can you? You make me sick. You make me SICK, Harry Potter!"

"Ron, stop yelling, please. Why don't we go up to the dormitory and discuss things a bit more civilly?"

"How convenient of you to talk about being civil when you've just had your way with my sister!"

"Ronald Weasley, how dare you talk about me and Harry like that? Have you completely lost it? Yes, we snogged over the summer, but it's not like that anymore, do you understand? We're just friends, but I don't need to explain myself to _you_. Who do you think you are, Ron? Huh? Just because the one girl you ever had a remote chance of snogging died doesn't mean you ruin the fun for the rest of us! No Harry - don't try to stop me, he deserves to hear this. I love Hermione, but I never understood what she saw in you. And you see how it is - she'd rather die than be with you, you piece of scum!"

The Common Room was completely silent.

"Ginny, that's enough, let's go up to the dormitory now, okay?"

Ron took out his wand and pointed it at Ginny.

"Ooh, big boy, I wouldn't do that if I were you. Remember that time you spent throwing up slugs—"

" _PETRIFICUS_ _TOTALUS_!"

Ginny froze. Harry turned to Ron, yelling, " _Expelliarmus_!"

Ron's eyes turned red as the wand flew out of his hands. He curled his fists into balls and looked around for something to throw. He found his book bag and took out a framed picture of himself with Harry and Hermione. It crashed to the floor, after which he started hurling books, and ink pots, and everything he could find. Harry reversed the spell on Ginny, getting more and more alarmed as things started getting out of hand. _What was going on with Ron?_

When he looked up, he saw Alexa walking towards them. _Oh no,_ he thought, _Ron shouldn't try something on her, oh please, no…_

"Ronald Weasley. Ron."

Her voice was very low. It sounded almost ethereal. It wasn't just because it was pleasant and musical. This was different. This was what Ginny had been saying about putting the bad thoughts to rest. Except this was more than her normal voice. She was doing something, and whatever it was, it was working, because though Ron was still on a rampage, he was slowing down.

"Shh, Ron, it's alright now. It's going to be just fine. Why don't we go to the dormitory where it'll all be better?"

"I don't want to go anywhere!" complained Ron, but it lacked the rage of before, coming out as a nasally whine.

"I have to tell you something, Ron, don't you want to know? It's very important. And then you'll feel alright again. Everything will be just fine again. Won't you come with me?"

 _What was she doing?_ Harry thought in amazement as Ron followed her up to the boys' dormitory (as boys couldn't enter the girls'). He and Ginny followed them, but when they tried to enter the room, Alexa held up her hand, asking them to wait. Ron was on the bed and Alexa seemed to be doing some sort of hypnosis with him.

"I want you to close your eyes now, Ron, close your eyes nice and tight. Do you feel yourself feeling better? Do you feel all those bad thoughts melting away? Do you feel your anger dissipating?"

Ron grunted.

"Shh now, it's going to be just fine, now, isn't it? I want you to keep your eyes closed, nice and tight, and I want you to think of all that rage and see it fly away from you. Do you see it, Ron? You feel better already, don't you? It's like they're going to bed, isn't it? Yeah? You feel better? Yes, just like that, Ron, keep your eyes shut. Do you want to go to bed too? Yeah? Think of how soft the pillow is, think of how warm that blanket makes you feel. You like that, don't you? You know you want to go to sleep now, yes you do…"

And then, almost miraculously, Ron snored.

" _Petrificus Totalus,_ " murmured Alexa calmly.

"Is that necessary, Alexa?" asked Ginny tentatively.

Alexa regarded Ginny with something Harry couldn't comprehend. "A lot more necessary than some of the things you said before, I can say for sure."

Then she sighed. "He might have woken up and not remembered he was calmly put to bed, he'd have thought you two tricked him or hexed him and then he'd work himself into a frenzy again. Harry, we need to take him to St Mungo's, he's Sinking."

"What? What's - sinking? What do you mean? Is he going to —?"

"He's not going to die, Harry. I'll - I'll explain later. I'm going to bring Madam Pomfrey, okay?"

Within minutes, she had appeared with Madam Pomfrey and it seemed like she'd already explained the matter to her as Madam Pomfrey knew what was going on.

The matron levitated Ron's body, taking him outside the Gryffindor Tower. As Ginny and Harry raced out, they bumped into Luna, who'd clearly been running too and looked very frazzled.

"Harry, what's going on?"

"No time, Luna, I'll tell you la—"

"Harry Potter, you're going to tell me right this instant what's wrong!"

Harry sighed. There was only so much yelling he could take in a single evening.

"Ron's Sinking, Luna, but I'm not sure what it means. We're taking him to St Mungo's."

"I'm coming too," she said with finality, and that was that.

They met Dumbledore in the courtyard, where he was carrying the St Mungo's Portkey. They all held onto it, and after an uncomfortable few moments, they arrived at the wizarding hospital.

Ron was rushed to the Sinking department, where Alexa explained everything to the Mediwizards and Mediwitches. Dumbledore sent off a letter to the Weasleys intimating them about the situation. Madam Pomfrey was sent back to Hogwarts although she wanted to stay.

Within half an hour, Mrs Weasley had arrived along with Mr Weasley, Bill, Charlie and Fred and George. They barged into Ron's room, Mrs Weasley bursting into tears as soon as she saw her son unconscious. Harry quietly walked out of the room, letting the Weasleys have their privacy. He turned around to see if Luna was coming too, but she didn't look like she was going to leave Ron's side anytime soon.

He sat down on one of the chairs outside Ron's ward. That clean, surgical hospital smell brought back memories. Terrible memories. Sirius's dead body. Hermione's last moments. Memories he wanted to forget. Memories Ron was holding onto on purpose.

At the sound of footsteps, Harry looked up. Alexa looked gently at him and sat down beside him.

"Tell me."

Alexa looked into Harry's eyes for a moment.

"Do you want to know everything? Even the things that might hurt? Even the things that might not apply to Ron's case in particular?"

Harry nodded.

"Sinking is the magical equivalent of depression."

Harry stared into her eyes.

She took his hand in hers and continued, "Muggle depression is often caused due to an imbalance in production of serotonin, the happy hormone. I'm sure you know its effects are heartbreaking. Magical depression, or Sinking, is even worse than that because the chemicals interact with the magical blood and create 'sad cells' . The symptoms are similar, there's moodiness, a lack of appetite, anger, a lack of interest in things they loved. However, in magical depression, there can be an intense surge of the 'sad cells', which leads to the victim slipping into a coma which can take a few weeks at the very least to come out of. At this stage the patient is said to have 'Sunk'. The reason I wanted Ron rushed to St Mungo's was that it's easier to get Sunk when you're asleep, but I had to get him asleep or he would have hurt himself eventually."

She bit her lip and frowned. "I'm forgetting something. Oh - oh yes, sometimes, when the patient has Sunk, they sink deeper into their coma, and it can take months or even years to bring them back. This is called Drowning. It's very rare, but there are people who could never be brought back. And sometimes, even if they do come back, they've lost their sanity and no longer have the will to live."

She gripped his hand tighter as Harry processed all her words.

"Is it fatal?"

"No, but getting Sunk multiple times weakens your mind and brain after a while, making it easier to get permanently Drowned. And when you've been Drowned for a few years, it's - it's a bit like being brain dead."

Harry stared at the drab hospital walls.

"Harry."

He looked up.

"Harry. It'll be alright. Ron is young. This is his first time Sinking. We can cure him. We can treat him. There are Healers for this. We just need to wait for him to wake up and we can make things alright. Harry, look at me. It's going to be fine. Harry."

She was using that voice again. He felt incredibly tired. He didn't know whether it was because of the strain of the entire evening, or because Alexa was hypnotising him or something.

"What's that thing you're doing, Alexa? What's that voice you're using? And - and how do you know so much about Sinking, are you a Healer or what?"

"Harry —"

Just then, Ron's door opened. Ginny appeared, looking flustered. Harry suddenly had a vision of Ginny at age eleven, rocking back and forth because she wanted to tell them about Riddle. He stood up.

"Ginny, what's wrong?"

"It's Ron, he's - he's Sunk."

 **A/N:**

 **My next update will be next month because of my exams.**

 **As always, a review would be appreciated, constructive criticism is welcome!**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N:**

 **I've changed the rating to T, just in case something comes up later on. Thanks to everyone who's favourited, followed or reviewed, your appreciation means a lot.**

 **Disclaimer : Harry Potter and his world belong to JK Rowling. I only own the characters I've created.**

* * *

 **Chapter Four**

Harry blinked.

He turned to Alexa. She rose. She looked into his eyes, then, turning to Ginny, tiptoed up to pull her into an embrace. When she let go, she looked again at Harry. She looked like she was going to extend her hand again so that Harry would take it, but something held her back.

 _Does she feel shy?_ wondered Harry. Then again, the two had hardly known each other and she'd held his hand already. She was definitely afraid of seeming too clingy.

So he took her hands in his, just before entering Ron's ward. He didn't look at her. She seemed surprised, but didn't say anything. It wasn't the time.

Because in front of them lay a very, very still Ron Weasley.

To Harry, who had shared a dorm with Ron for five years, it appeared almost as though Ron was fast asleep. He looked up to see Bill whispering something to Charlie. Mrs Weasley was sobbing into her husband's shoulder, who was stroking her head absently as he looked on at his son. Ginny had positioned herself next to the twins, leaning against them slightly. Luna had her hand on Ron's face, looking at him in wonder.

"Ah, Harry, you're here now, good," Dumbledore called out.

Then Harry saw the Healer in the room. She was a tall, plump old witch, who looked almost ancient but for her bright eyes, which stopped her from looking completely senile. She seemed oddly familiar.

"Mr Potter, Ms McGonagall, I was just explaining everything to the Weasleys. Alexa, I know you need no introduction to the topic of Sinking, do you?"

Harry glanced over at Alexa. The Healer seemed to know her. He wondered if Alexa had known someone who'd Sunk.

"No, Healer Pomfrey, not really, no."

Harry frowned. "Excuse me, but - Healer Pomfrey?"

"My name's Edwina, you can call me Healer Pomfrey, Mr Potter. Poppy's my baby sister. We were both in love with medicine, but she was always the one who loved children more."

Harry nodded.

"You, now, Mr Potter. I don't suppose those Muggle relatives told you anything about Sinking? Professor Dumbledore here tells me you haven't the foggiest about it, now do you, boy?"

"Er - Alexa just told me about it."

Healer Pomfrey nodded. She opened her mouth again to say something, when Ginny spoke up.

"It's my fault, isn't it? He was hurting so bad, and I'd _just_ lectured Harry about how we need to give him time, and respect his feelings, and then like a total hypocrite, like a total cow, I went and started saying all those ghastly things to him. It's just - I didn't mind him saying all that about me, not that much, but I didn't like how he tried to make Harry out to be that kind of guy, you know? The one mums tell you to stay away from? After everything Harry's gone through I just—"

Harry let go of Alexa's hand and walked over to Ginny, putting his hand on her shoulder. Alexa's eyes fell to where Harry's hand had been and felt an odd pang she forced herself not to think about.

"Nobody blames you, Ginny, none of us knew he was Sinking, he'd been acting up for weeks now, it's not your fault you lost your cool—"

"You told me to stop and I didn't!"

"Miss Weasley. Don't be so hard on yourself. Your predicament is normal, questioning your behaviour, blaming yourself. I see it a lot in patients' families, but darling, you have to understand the roots to Sinking lie elsewhere – the boy has seen trauma, real trauma, and lost the girl I believe he was in love with at, at the ripe old age of sixteen! Trust me dear when I say this, he's not lying in this hospital bed because of a sibling spat!

And besides, it's a good thing you provoked him. The state he was in, he would have Sunk soon enough anyway if he'd have gone untreated. By provoking him, you got him getting all his anger out. If he would have got that rage in him when he Sank, it would have been trapped in him throughout the duration of having Sunk, and it's not a pretty sight. It's downright painful for the family to watch all that writhing about."

Harry noticed Alexa biting her lip and nodding.

"So, Miss Weasley, I think you should be glad you got your brother all riled up. That, accompanied by Alexa's healing technique there, and your brother will get better soon, honey. He's sixteen, his brain is healthy, it'll help strengthen his mind. Just give him some time."

Mrs Weasley began to shake her head. "I can't just - give him time! I - he's my son! My Ronniekins needs to be up and about, he's just a - just a child!"

"Mrs Weasley —"

"I'm not budging from here till my son opens his eyes, lady. I don't care how long you take - but I'd rather it's sooner rather than later because you don't want a woman like me on your hands for long!"

"Mrs Weasley, we don't mind arranging a room for you right here at St Mungo's, but I assure you, in this condition, he'll be out for at least a month. I do not want you inconvenienced at any cost—"

"Inconvenienced, Healer Pomfrey? That's my boy!"

"Come now, Molly. There is truth to what Edwina says. He'll be stuck in here for a month at the very least. There's truly no point to it. But for your peace of mind, I will get Edwina to keep you updated every day. And when the month is up, we'll set you up in a room here so you'll be the first face he sees when he wakes up. How does that sound?"

Mrs Weasley reluctantly nodded to Dumbledore.

"You're all free to visit him whenever you like, and as for you four—" he looked at Harry, Alexa, Ginny and Luna, "pay me a visit and I'll write you up a note and have you dropped off with the Portkey. Now, I must return to Hogwarts, urgent business, so I'm afraid you'll have to come along with me. Remember, you can return whenever you like."

With that, the five of them bid adieu to the rest of the Weasleys, and grabbed onto the Portkey to return to Hogwarts.

* * *

It was late when they returned. They'd left school at about seven in the evening, and it was close to 10 when they were back. The Great Hall was almost empty when they reached there for dinner, and the few people there fell silent when they saw Dumbledore.

Dumbledore barely had a bite before leaving with McGonagall, who was rather cross she'd not been informed anything about Ron's condition ("As Head of House, I deserved to know, Albus!"), but the others were in no hurry to finish their meal. Ginny barely touched her food, Luna played with it at the Ravenclaw table, Harry picked at it, and while Alexa had managed to have a substantial amount of food, she didn't seem to want to return to the Common Room.

At last, Ginny pushed her plate away. "I'm going up to bed now, I just can't anymore. Are you lot coming?"

There was no need for Ginny to specify what exactly she meant by "can't anymore"; her friends understood her perfectly. They rose with her, and after calling out a goodbye to Luna, who waved dreamily back, they returned to the Common Room.

The Fat Lady shook her head in disapproval when she saw them. "So late?" she tut tutted. They were too exhausted to care.

"Password?"

"Leona Mortis," said Harry quickly.

They were given access. When they walked in, the Common Room was still bustling, but this time, unlike in the Great Hall, there was no silence. They found their way to their usual spot, where they found Neville leaning into his seat, waiting for them.

"Harry! You guys are back! I saw what happened with Ron; you look too knackered to talk right now, but I just thought I'd give you this."

Harry looked at what Neville put in his hands. It was the glass framed photograph of Harry, Ron and Hermione that Ron had smashed a few hours ago.

"You fixed it." Harry said in a low voice, touched by the simple action. "Neville, you're incredible, you know."

"It was just a quick _Reparo_ , Harry, nothing really."

Harry continued to look at the photograph with the faintest of smiles. "Thank you," he whispered. Neville beamed.

"Goodnight guys. See you tomorrow." That was Ginny, already walking towards the dormitory staircase.

"I'd best be going to bed too, Harry. I have to meet Professor Sprout early tomorrow for a special project. I'd thought I'd just wait up till you guys were back."

Harry nodded, then stopped Neville. "Thanks - again. Er - goodnight."

He turned to Alexa, who lay on the sofa from one end to the other, braiding her hair absentmindedly.

"Not going to bed, Alexa?"

"Not sleepy."

Harry regarded her with curiosity. Something was off with her. She didn't really know Ron, so why was she so upset?

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing," she replied in monosyllables.

Harry frowned. He paused, then remembered something. He sat down. He tried again.

"Who was it?"

"Hmmmmm?" Harry could see she wasn't listening.

"You know a lot about Sinking, and you seemed to know Healer Pomfrey. It appeared as though you've seen Sinking at close quarters before. Who —"

"I don't want to talk about it, Harry."

Harry pursed his lips. He tried to think of something she might find easier to talk about.

"Oh, oh, you never told me about that thing you did with Ron, that low voice thing you used with me at St Mungo's as well - what was it?"

Alexa sighed and turned to him at last. "Harry, I don't remember signing up for Twenty Questions! Can't you figure out that I'm not really in the mood to talk? I mean, you'd hardly be up to share if I were to ask you what it was like to spend every living moment of your life with the Dursleys for ten straight years, would you?"

Harry looked injured. There was a long pause of silence. She went back to her braid, this time more intensely focusing on it.

"I suppose I don't want you to end up like Ron, Sinking, because there's too much on your mind and nobody you're willing to talk about it with."

Alexa frowned slightly. "That's what I used to think too, and I'd always feel like Ginny, like it was my fault, like I shouldn't have said something, or like what you feel, like I _should_ have said something. But sometimes all someone wants, all someone needs, really, is to be by themselves. Alone. Just them with their thoughts."

"And when the thoughts get too much?"

"I'll come to you, Harry."

They locked eyes. Harry felt his face grow warm. Alexa looked away.

"Or Ginny. Or Luna, even, she's quite, well, profound, isn't she?"

"She is." He looked at his hands for a moment, for inspiration, then continued, "Well, do you want me to go then?"

A faint smile spread on her face. "No, I think it's fine. I don't mind your company all that much, even though you _do_ ask too many questions. Just one thing - you should probably get a book or something - my face gets boring after a while, did you know?"

Harry snickered shortly.

"I think I'll bring my DADA books down, Snape assigned us a reading thing, he won't be too happy if my answers go wrong. Then again, he won't be happy either way, why do I even bother? You'd think the man would be happy he got the job he's been pining after for years, and here he is, as greasy haired and overgrown bat-like as ever."

A playful smile danced about on Alexa's lips. "Ah, Snape. At least he got something he's been pining after for years."

Harry didn't hear her. He'd already left to get his book bag from his dorm. When he reached his four poster, he forced himself to look away from Ron's empty bed, and hurried back, just in case Alexa changed her mind and chose to go to bed. He needn't have worried, however, for she lay on the sofa like he'd never budged.

He opened to the chapter on Inferi, and began to read silently. Eventually, his mind began to wander. He found it so futile to sit in a classroom and read about those dark creatures when a war was going on outside. He found homework assignments silly when people were dying in hundreds. His parents had died for him when he was a baby. His godfather was dead. His best friend was dead. His other best friend was in a magical depression induced coma. Because of him. He hadn't wanted any of it. Not the losses, not the fame, not the glory, not the title of being the _bloody Chosen One_.

He sneaked a glance at Alexa. He was almost envious of how she blissfully lay there, now deconstructing her braids. He knew she had secrets, but at least her destiny hadn't been charted out for her. She had a famous surname too, but people didn't stand back in awe when they saw her, nor did they shudder. She was just Alexa. She smiled easily, she sulked easily, she didn't pretend. It was frustrating to see her being stubborn about her secrets, but he understood. Of course he understood.

"I was three years old when I called Uncle Vernon Daddy. Dudley had been watching one of those cartoons with a big family, Mummy and Daddy and lots of little children who loved each other. Besides, Dudley called Uncle Vernon Daddy too. I thought he would like it. That was the first time he hit me. He told me to never call him that again. I didn't understand. I thought he would be happy. I cried, but mostly I was just confused, I think, I don't remember it so well.

When I was four and some months old, Aunt Petunia used to take me and Dudley out to the park. Dudley began to bully me there, never letting me have a go on the swings. He'd keep looking out for what I wanted to play on, and he'd get there first. Aunt Petunia never defended me. If I told Dudley he was being a meanie she'd tell me that was no way to speak to a child, you know, because she and her bloody husband spoke to me in honey and sugar and - bloody treacle tart!"

Harry's voice had risen considerably with the last sentence, but he regained his composure and continued, "But I loved them still, because I'd seen in Dudley's show that - that family always loved each other, and they were my family. I don't remember when exactly they told me they weren't my parents, and that my mum and dad had died in a car crash, but I loved them for being my Uncle and Aunt.

During one of the visits to the park I'd seen a girl hug her mother, so I tried it on Aunt Petunia one evening. She didn't hit me like Uncle Vernon, she just went very stiff, then slowly took my arms off her, shaking ever so slightly. I remember her exact words, 'Get your knobbly fingers away from me, you freak.'"

Harry paused. "I think I began to hate them when I was eight. Perhaps not hate, I don't think I felt such intense feelings back then, but Dudley was getting worse, Uncle and Aunt had started hitting me as punishment, and I had to do all the chores. School was torture because Dudley beat up anybody who spoke to me, so naturally, everybody stayed away. I was the in - house freak who blew things up when I was sad, who let a boa constrictor free in a zoo, who couldn't get his haircut to last two days. I had no _friends_. Except maybe the boa constrictor. He was nice.

Living in the room under the stairs wasn't that bad because I was terribly small for my age, thank heavens I wasn't as big as Dudley, I wouldn't have been able to breathe. Heh, when I was younger, I actually thought _that_ was the reason why Dudley had a bigger room. Because he was bigger than I was. Not because the Dursleys were pathetic excuses for humans.

It got worse when the Hogwarts letters began to come, when Hagrid broke the house down to come get me, when I started attending school. Even now, after all these years, all I got from them was a toothpick for Christmas. A toothpick, Alexa, a toothpick!"

Harry bit his lip. He could feel his tear ducts go into overdrive. Not here, he thought. Not now.

"Harry, come here." Alexa was sitting up on the sofa now with her feet under her.

Harry shook his head.

"Harry Potter."

Harry reluctantly got up. He sat down tentatively, then looked at her.

"Do you have an Invisibility Cloak, Harry? The stories, are they true?"

Harry didn't understand.

"Just answer the question."

Harry nodded.

"Accio Invisibility Cloak!"

His Invisibility Cloak whooshed down towards them, then when it was safely in Alexa's hands, she turned to him.

"Cry, Harry. Cry. I can see you holding those tears back, looking up at the ceiling so that they don't fall. I know you won't like to do this in front of everybody, so get under this Cloak, I'll put a spell on you, and then you have to cry, Harry. Sadness, anger, they're poisons that don't deserve to live within us, Harry, and tears are the healthiest and least invasive way of getting them out. Nobody will be able to see you, not even me. Nobody will be able to hear you either, and nobody will laugh at you. I know tears shouldn't have to be hidden, I'd rather you did it without all of this, but I respect your privacy. You trust me enough to share this with me, but tears are extremely personal, and I know we're not there yet. It's okay, Harry. Get under the Cloak."

She put the Cloak on him, then muttered, "Muffliato!"

And then she waited beside him, looking pointedly in the other direction because she knew that even if she couldn't see him, he could see her and he'd be uncomfortable.

After several long minutes, the Cloak came off. Harry muttered a quick incantation, then he coughed audibly and Alexa knew he'd ended the spell.

His face was shining with fresh tears. He was still, then he wiped them off with his sleeve. She let him have a moment.

"I can't believe I just cried over the bloody Dursleys."

"Oh, but you didn't, Harry. You were crying because of everything you've ever lost. Affection from family, a normal childhood, knowing your parents, you didn't get any of it. You were crying because talking about the Dursleys – it made you feel unloved. It reminded you of the pain, it brought everything back, didn't it?"

Harry nodded.

"Harry, you _are_ loved. The love lives inside you." She took his hands in hers, then tracing his fingers, she continued, "I've heard how you offed Quirrel by just putting these hands on him. Ginny loved hearing that story, and she'd never shut up while recounting it. Harry, your parents love you, no matter where they are. Sirius, Hermione, they're with you. Ron will be back. And as for the rest of us, Ginny, Luna, Neville and I, we're here for you, we're standing by you no matter what."

Harry shook his head slightly, then took his hand out of her grasp.

"Maybe you shouldn't be here for me. Maybe you shouldn't stand by my side! Any of you! What good did it do anybody? What did they gain? Everybody just died. I didn't want any of it, Alexa. Maybe it's best if you just stayed away."

"What did they gain? Harry, you may have only just got to know me, but I've known you vicariously through Ginny for years, and you're a wonderful wizard, you really are. You're kind, and you're brave, and you're loyal, and, when the time comes, you're going to be the one who defeats Voldemort. And when that happens, none of it will have happened in vain."

Harry snorted. "By the time I finally face Voldemort, everybody else would be dead, and it would just be me and the nose-less sod shooting spells at each other until one of us gets exhausted, and that'll probably be me. Alexa, I'm not perfect, I'm just – Harry."

"Nobody thinks you're perfect, Harry, don't think so highly of yourself," she scoffed. "But they want you to be, they need you to be their saviour, to deliver them from all the evil in the world. But that doesn't mean you have to be perfect. Nobody is. I mean, look at me. I can be full of bluster and threat, but that's only because I don't want people thinking I'm a vulnerable baby because I'm not even five feet tall and my legs swing in the air if I lean all the way into a chair.

I'm not smart, not by any means. I'd wanted to be in Ravenclaw like my mum, but the Sorting Hat told me I wasn't smart enough, that I was stupid and it was sending me to Gryffindor because the only thing dimwits like me were good for was rushing into trouble recklessly to save the day. That's why I spend all the time at the library, not because I'm a genius like Hermione, but because I have to work twice as hard as everyone else!

And —" she stopped.

"And?"

"And nobody even glances at me when Ginny's next to me. She's always the one who has wizards buying drinks for her at The Three Broomsticks, and I'm always the one wizards chat up just to get close to Ginny. I'm not jealous of her, I just – I wish I could be like Luna, taking it all in my stride, not caring what people think of me, but I'm human! I do care. Too much, even. A slightly rude comment could have been said to me, I'll retort just as harshly, then cry myself to sleep."

Then Alexa straightened herself and continued, "I'm not telling you this because I want your sympathy or for you to tell me I'm good enough. I know I'm stunning, but you need to know that everybody's struggling, it just gets easier when we're all in this together. And by saying it's better if we stayed away, you're doing exactly what Ron did. I know I was avoiding your questions earlier too, but I'll open up to you eventually, Harry, I just need a little more time."

Harry nodded.

"I think I'll go to bed now, Harry."

"Me too."

* * *

 **A/N:**

 **I hope you liked that! Let me know what you think in the reviews, criticism is always welcome :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N:**

 **Happy Easter and April Fools' Day! Hope you enjoy this chapter!**

 **Disclaimer: Only the characters and situations you don't recognise belong to me. All other characters and the Harry Potter world belong to JKR.**

* * *

 **Chapter Five**

Harry's alarm seemed to go off louder that morning. After all, it didn't have Ron's snores to compete with for Harry's attention.

He got dressed, then went to the Great Hall for breakfast. He was surprised to see Alexa alone, when her fifth year friends were sitting a short distance away.

"Hi Harry," she smiled up at him.

"Hey," he replied, sitting down opposite her. He took a bite of his cereal, then looking carefully into her eyes, murmured, "Thanks for last night."

"It was nothing,"

"I needed it."

She offered him a warm smile. "It gets better, Harry."

He nodded. "How come you're alone?"

"There's been a parting of ways. Ginny and I against the others – Meera, Alice, Oliver and Colin. Actually Ginny against the others, but obviously, I'm on her side. She was going to do her Bat Bogey Hex right outside the Great Hall, but Neville found us. He took her away to calm her down. I was going to go along and try my little calming trick on her—" at this she waved her fingers about a bit, "—but Neville told me to save them a seat or else Ginny would be pissed if she had to go without her breakfast."

Harry bit back a smile.

"What was the fight about?"

Alexa sighed and stabbed her fork into her sausage. "I've seen it coming for a while now. I suppose we're all just growing apart. I mean, when we first met, Ginny and I were immediately best friends, and she was mad for you, and then we met Colin, and he and Ginny started a little Harry Potter Fan Club—"

"That actually happened? Ron had mentioned it jokingly, but I never…" Harry broke off, his face reddening.

Alexa grinned. "And then we met Meera and Alice, we share our four poster, you see. And Oliver's fancied Meera since first year, so he tagged along with us. We were all so fresh, impressionable and lacking opinion. We were in a fluffy, happy little bubble when we came in, safe in the knowledge that the wizarding world was doing just brilliantly since you'd saved the day. But then—"

"But then?"

"It was like Ginny had two lives – one with us, and another with you. When you saved Ginny in the Chamber of Secrets, all of us silently knew it wouldn't ever be the same again, and that you and Ginny would eventually grow close. Colin was so jealous he didn't talk to her for a week. And then, well, eventually, that _did_ happen. There was you, Hermione. They even envied Luna. I suppose it was because no matter how inconsequential her friendship with you guys was, she was always fiercely protective of everything you guys used to say to her because she never wanted to let a secret slip out. She never said a word about what it was like to be friends with the Golden Trio, and that infuriated the others to a great extent."

"It never infuriated you?"

"Not really, no. Perhaps a little. But even at eleven I knew some secrets had to be kept no matter what, and I respected her for having that level of maturity in her. And I guess that's why she eased up around me too, because I'd never hassle her for Harry Potter gossip. Yeah, she'd go on and on about you, but it was only what was already on the grapevine. Never anything remotely sensitive."

Harry looked down at his food in silence. He'd always trusted Ginny, but hearing this made him feel a special warmth towards her again. It was confusing and inexplicable, just like how he couldn't stop thinking of her even though he knew romance wasn't what he wanted with her. He just smiled.

"And then last year, Meera, Alice and Oliver thought you were lying about Voldemort. Of course, I believed you, as did Ginny. Colin's support wasn't much of a surprise either, that bloke worshipped you. But it drove a wedge between us. We weren't talking the entire year. They came to their senses after the Department of Mysteries thing, obviously. And we forgave them, but nothing's the same. She refused to tell the others what happened with Ron, and Alice got mad at her and said she knew this would happen, since she was 'sleeping around with Harry Potter now'—"

Harry opened his mouth, outraged, but Alexa cut him off.

"Her words, not mine. Ginny didn't take it well, quite naturally, plus she's already got Ron's situation on her mind, and having barely slept a wink last night, it's a miracle those guys are still in one piece."

Harry sighed. "I'm worried for her. With everything that's going on, shouldn't she keep her friends close, as many as she can?"

"Oh, but don't you see see, Harry? She needs real friends, and even one of those is enough; Ginny has plenty. She has us, Harry, she'll get through this. Such situations either bring people closer or drive them further apart – she's making the right decision, Harry, trust me. And more importantly, trust her."

Harry nodded reluctantly. He took a bite of his breakfast, then looked up to see Alexa looking intently at him.

"What?"

Alexa blinked, her facing colouring and growing warm. "Nothing."

Harry put his fork down.

"Look, it was really cute and mysterious and quirky in the beginning when you had all those secrets but at this point, Alexa, it's terribly frustrating and I'm honestly contemplating hexing you, okay?"

"I just – remembered something."

Harry rolled his eyes. "What a groundbreaking revelation."

"No – I – you probably wouldn't remember," she sighed. "It was your second year. It was Valentine's Day. Lockhart had those dwarves going around, barging into classes, yelling out everybody's valentines."

"I do remember," Harry said softly, a slow smile spreading on his face.

"Um, Ginny'd sent you one too. It went like this – _His eyes are as green as a fresh pickled toad_ —"

"— _His hair is as dark as a blackboard._

 _I wish he was mine, he's really divine,_

 _The hero who conquered the Dark Lord_ ," finished Harry.

Alexa's eyes widened. "You – you remember?" she sputtered.

Harry laughed. "It was nice. I still hadn't exactly come to terms with all the attention being showered on me, and after all that time with the Dursleys, it was a welcome change, really."

"But you got a lot of valentines, Harry, why do you remember this one by word?"

"I found it quite – sweet. And it wasn't like anybody else bothered to write me a poem. In fact, a lot of my valentines were downright inappropriate, definitely not something a twelve year old should have received. It was a bit disturbing, and McGonagall had to put an end to it after the last one she heard, that one was _particularly_ saucy."

Alexa laughed, trying to imagine the dwarves yelling out in the corridors all the racy things the females of Hogwarts had wanted to do to poor, young, mortified Harry.

"What reminded you of it?"

Alexa stopped laughing. "Your eyes looked particularly green this morning. And then I wondered if you knew."

"Knew what?"

"That it wasn't really Ginny who wrote it."

Harry frowned. "But then – she'd been so embarrassed – why would she—"

"No, you don't understand. It _was_ from Ginny, except, somebody else _wrote_ it for her."

Realisation dawned upon Harry. "It was _you_ ," he said, an eyebrow raised and a smirk on his lips. Alexa suddenly seemed to find her fingernails very fascinating. Harry found himself laughing again.

"Ginny didn't have a single creative bone in her, she couldn't even get words to rhyme—"

"Ooh yes, and that's something you're particularly gifted with, I must say, being able to ever so creatively get words to rhyme. I don't think anybody's ever, ever described eyes that way. Full marks for originality, Miss McGonagall, full marks."

Harry waited for Alexa to finish laughing, then continued, "Maybe that's why it didn't work out with Cho. Because every time she looked into my eyes, instead of drowning in how dreamy they are, she was reminded of toads! Fresh pickled ones! Poor girl! Oh and – oh Alexa, this couldn't have been the first draft, could it? There have to be other versions of it, displays of your soulful skill at its finest!"

At this point, they were both roaring with laughter, but Alexa's mirth couldn't match up to Harry's, who had tears in his eyes at the memory of the valentine.

"What's so funny?" muttered Ginny, who'd just walked in with Neville. She was still clearly in a dark mood.

"Alexa's poetry," said Harry, trying to compose himself. He was surprised to see that his remark elicited the faintest of smiles from Ginny. But she didn't really say anything, she was wolfing down her breakfast, while Neville did the same next to her, although he looked slightly pleased with himself.

And then the bell rang, and it was time for the first class. Potions.

* * *

Harry had begun looking forward to Potions. With Horace Slughorn as Professor, classes went a lot smoother, and besides, he had the textbook that had belonged to the 'Half Blood Prince', so naturally his performance in class had greatly improved. He could imagine that even Hermione would have envied him. He felt that familiar jolt of pain at the thought of her, but he was learning to move on.

When he reached the dungeons, he suddenly realised he had none of his friends to sit with. Hermione's absence he'd gradually grown accustomed to, but without Ron as well, he felt terribly alone.

Then he turned around and saw Neville, who smiled and said, "sitting with me, Harry?" to which he readily agreed.

The day's lesson had them brewing Amortentia. With the Half Blood Prince's help, Harry was the first to finish. Impressed, Slughorn awarded Gryffindor twenty points, asking him if he felt like sharing with the class what it smelled like to him. Harry knew it had a distinctive smell for everybody, and he realised this would be the moment of truth, because he would know once and for all whether the feelings he had for Ginny were romantic. But he didn't smell anything controversial.

"Treacle tart and broomsticks, Professor," he said.

Slughorn seemed disappointed. "Is that all?"

Harry nodded, taking his seat again. Then all of a sudden, something told him to take another whiff of his potion. It was another scent, faint and mild. It was not flowery, so he knew it wasn't Ginny's smell; on the contrary, it was a fresh, citrusy fragrance, and he knew Ginny wasn't fond of oranges. That ruled her out then.

"How have you gotten so good at potions, Harry?" whispered Neville.

Harry considered it for a moment, then decided not to tell Neville about the Half Blood Prince. He simply shrugged, and when the class was over (with Neville needing a quick trip to the Hospital Wing because he'd added too many ashwinder eggs, causing the concoction to bubble out all over him), he tried not to feel slightly guilty.

* * *

After a full day of classes, exhausted, Harry returned to the Common Room, and began his homework to get it over with as soon as possible. Midway, he looked up to see Alexa walking towards him.

He smiled at her quickly, then asked if she'd seen Ginny.

Alexa regarded him for just a moment, then said, "You were hoping I was her, weren't you?"

"I – what?"

She simply raised an eyebrow, then continued, "She's with Neville. She said she wanted to talk to him about something."

"Oh," was all Harry said.

Alexa looked at him in amusement. "You're jealous."

"I am _not_ ," Harry said, rather defensively. "I don't like her that way, alright? She's just a friend, and I'd just rather she talked to me. Besides, my Amortentia doesn't even smell like her. Er, you do know what Amortentia is, don't you?"

She nodded. "What does it smell like for you anyway?"

"Treacle tart and broomsticks and – and yeah, that's about it."

"It usually smells of a combination of three things, Harry."

Harry looked at her. "It's none of your business, Alexa,"

"Relax, Potter, no need to get your wand in a knot. If you don't want to tell, it's alright."

She walked over and sat down on the other end of the sofa on which Harry was seated. She looked at him again, then took out something from her bag.

"I thought you'd like to see some of the rejected drafts, Harry,"

Harry looked up at her, confused, until he saw what she was talking about.

" _On the Quidditch Team he plays as Seeker_

 _But if he was my man, he'd be a keeper!_ – okay honestly, Alexa!"

"I rejected that because it said man and you were only twelve and replacing it with boy made it sound like you were Ginny's son, and I—"

Harry had already moved onto the next one.

" _His eyes gleam like a golden Snitch_

 _I saw him and my breath hitched_

 _He was my Snitch, I thought I'd trapped him with my charms, but – oh no!_

 _Alas, my fingers were too slow!_ "

He put the parchment down without laughing.

"I thought you'd find it funny, Harry,"

Harry grinned at her. "It is, it is. I just – it still feels nice that someone liked me so much she got her best friend to write me a poem, and write multiple drafts too. It's so ridiculous but it's touching, you know?"

Alexa smiled. She looked like she wanted to say something. She watched him read the other poems about him, then cleared her throat a little.

"Are you busy, Harry?"

Harry looked at his half-done homework. It could wait. He shook his head at Alexa. She took a deep breath.

"Right, um, so, it was my Dad," she said, fumbling through her words. Seeing Harry's blank face, she continued, "You were asking me yesterday, about whom I'd seen Sinking. It was my Dad."

"Is that why he's in St Mungo's?"

She nodded. "The first time he Sank was when my mum died, when I was just a baby. He didn't actually Sink, he directly Drowned, he was so traumatised. And he'd had two or three other Drowning incidents when I was a bit older – he'd be out for several months at a time, sometimes a year. Min would look after me then. It got to the point where his mind got torn down with every Drowning, so he became very fragile. And then, the Death Eaters came.

They Crucio'd him, but it interfered with his sad cells and the potions he was taking, and then he Drowned, so the pain and the torture is still trapped in him and he keeps writhing and thrashing about in his bed. He had to be physically strapped down as well as bound by magic to the bed, it got so bad. That's why I thought it would help if I calmed Ron in case he Sank."

Harry wanted to ask her how she'd calmed Ron, but he knew the answer would come in time.

"Didn't you want to visit him yesterday?"

"It hurts to see him like that, so weak, so in pain, so out of control."

Harry looked at her. Her hurt was blatant, with the creased brow, the bitten lip, the downcast eyes, the fidgeting fingers. He saw her nervously pick the skin on her left thumb with her index finger.

"You didn't have to tell me this, Alexa. If you're not ready to talk about it yet, I understand. You don't have to do this just because I told you about the Dursleys."

"I wanted to. I saw how different you were this morning. You – you laughed, Harry. I haven't seen you laugh in the past two years and I wanted that kind of catharsis."

Harry looked at her gently, taking her hand tentatively in his. "You've never talked about this with anybody before?"

She shook her head sadly.

"Why me?"

"Because you know what it feels like to feel responsible when somebody else gets hurt."

Harry looked into her blue eyes, wondering why she blamed herself for what happened to her father, admiring how her little self could take on such a great burden upon itself. He squeezed her hand a little, then let it go. He'd never been a physically affectionate person, and no matter how hard he tried, the awkwardness of holding hands with Alexa never left him. He wanted it to feel right, but it was just too soon. He could hardly expect himself to reach that level of comfort with her just yet.

"He'll get better – won't he?" asked Harry hesitatingly. Seeing too many people around him die was enough for Harry to know that promises of a person getting better couldn't always stay unbroken.

She started nodding her head, then looked away and started shaking it, biting down harder on her lip now, till a bead of blood appeared. She licked it, keeping her eyes off Harry.

"If you want to laugh like I did this morning, you have to cry like I did last night,"

Alexa frowned, then continued to shake her head.

"You're a bit of a hypocrite, you know," said Harry, making a face, to which Alexa smirked. Then he saw her absently rubbing her foot. "What's wrong?" he asked, gesturing at it with his eyes.

"Eh, it's nothing, I tripped,"

"Again? It's been happening quite a bit these days, right?"

She simply shrugged, then got up to go to the library, waving a quick goodbye to him. He simply watched her leave, slightly concerned at the limp in her step.

Then he saw Ginny walk into the Common Room with a smile on her face, lost in her thoughts. A couple fighting loudly brought her back to reality, and she looked around for Harry. She found him at last, and seeing his eyes on her already, her face lit up and she sped up.

"Harry, I'm going to go flying, want to join me?"

"Why, is Neville busy?" spat Harry, with uncharacteristic bitterness, surprising himself as well as Ginny. But she wasn't one to stay quiet.

"You don't find _me_ complaining when you talk to Alexa, do you? In fact, that's what you wanted, wasn't it? To get to know her, be friends with her? What happened? I mean, Neville's your friend too, Harry, we've all been closer for a year now, especially after what happened at the Ministry."

"But now it's like he's imposing himself on us, Ginny! Every breathing moment he's butting in, trying to be all pally with us, trying to fit right in, trying to be my friend!"

"But he _is_ your friend, Harry!"

"He's trying to be Ron and Hermione. Not just with me. With you too. And I hate it. I like spending time with you, and after what's happened with Ron —"

"—we need to keep our true friends close," she finished. "Harry, Neville's not trying to replace Ron and Hermione. Nobody can. But you need a friend, and Neville's here. For both of us. He's had his fair share of struggles too, and he understands. He's just trying to help."

"But you're spending all your time with him instead of with me, Ginny, and I – I don't like it."

Ginny felt impatient. "Harry, you don't own me! You don't get to decide who I can and can't spend my time with! You're as bad as Ron!"

"I want you to spend all your time with me."

Ginny sighed, and sat down. "Harry, is this about what we've been doing over the summer? I'm sorry if you've gotten used to me hanging out exclusively with you, Harry, but if you feel something more for me we should probably talk about it."

"I do feel something for you, Ginny, and you feel it too! It's the reason we were snogging each other all summer, even if both of us realised romance wasn't what we wanted. I like being around you, to the point where it hurts when you're not around – too much. Like when you come back from spending time with Neville looking all flustered and distracted and silly-happy and —"

"I hated it when I found you laughing with Alexa at breakfast. You so rarely laugh, and you were rolling with mirth this morning, Harry!"

"If other people make us happy, why is it still you I keep thinking about?"

"Harry —"

"We may have decided to leave our relationship at 'friends who can't stop thinking about each other', but I think we both know there's more to it. I'm going to get to the bottom of this, Gin, because I need answers, and you do too.

And now, if you're still going to go flying, I'm coming. Merlin knows the Captain of the Gryffindor team can't be out of shape!"

He summoned his broom, as did Ginny, and they both went out to do what they did best – flying.

* * *

A week passed. It was time for Quidditch tryouts. The pitch was brimming with people, girls who kept giggling or falling over each other (some of them were Slytherins, to Harry's horror), and some of them had clearly never been on a broom before. The result was that the tryouts ended up lasting four hours.

Halfway through, Harry had to announce a fifteen minute break. As he sipped on his water, he saw McGonagall behind him. He turned to her. "Good morning, Professor," he called out to her. Her beady eyes looked at him nervously.

"Don't tell her I was here. She – she won't like that."

Harry nodded, waiting for McGonagall to go on.

"I'm worried for her. She shouldn't be on a broom. I had such a bad fall when that cheating Slytherin knocked me off, I couldn't play another match! I've always wanted to see them thrashed after that, but does it have to be Alexa who has to be there while it's done?"

"Professor, do you not want her to be on the team?"

"Forget I said this, Harry. Forget you saw me. Choose fairly. If she deserves to be on the team, bring her in. She's fifteen, I'm sure she'll be careful."

Harry nodded. When the break ended, McGonagall got up and left inconspicuously. The tryouts resumed as normal.

At the end of it, Katie Bell returned to the team as Chaser. Demelza Robins was a new find, and Dean Thomas would be a permanent member of the team after the first match, where Ginny would play as Chaser. Ginny would play as Seeker once Harry left. The Beaters were Ritchie Coote and Jimmy Peakes. Harry had been hesitant about his choice of Keeper, but at last he decided there was no better person for it on that pitch that day than Alexa. Madam Hooch declared Ginny the new Captain, as Katie would be busy with her NEWTs, and Harry had chosen to decline the captaincy. Harry was happy for his friends, and in the midst of all the clapping, he noticed Neville in the stands, cheering them on.

Harry tried not to make a face.

* * *

 **A/N:**

 **I can't wait to write the next chapter, it's going to be an important one. More of Alexa will be revealed, Harry's going to finally learn why he feels this way about Ginny, there'll be Quidditch. It's going to be up soon in a week or so. Let me know what you think in the reviews below, I enjoy reading them! And do follow and favourite, really boosts my morale :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: EmeraldGuardian7 wrote in a review about Harry and Ginny probably being under the effects of a love potion - this is not the case, but it's something Harry thinks as well! I'm glad somebody else thought of this too!**

 **Disclaimer: everything you recognise belongs to JKR**

* * *

 **Chapter Six**

Harry was happy with the choices he'd made, and with the choice Madam Hooch had made, of selecting Ginny as the Captain. When the spectators left, and the celebrations on the pitch began to wane, he heard Alexa and Ginny talk about going up to the bathrooms for a long soak. They shouted loud "see you later"s and he made his way to return to the Common Room.

When he got there, he remembered he was alone, so he went up to his four poster. Exhaustion flooded through every fibre of his being, and he finally rested his head on the pillow. He found himself dreaming of treacle tart and broomsticks and that fresh burst of citrus. He felt at peace, after a long time.

Then he felt himself shaking. Or being shaken by somebody else, more like. When he opened his eyes, he saw Neville. He frowned, then hugged the sheets tighter around himself and turned away from him, muttering, "Why don't you go find Ginny, she _loves_ spending time with you."

Neville's voice got more insistent. Reluctantly, Harry opened his eyes wider than a crack, then, putting on his glasses, he got out of bed.

"Harry, she's in the Hospital Wing, you've got to come quick!"

Harry froze. _No. Let her be okay. Nothing could happen to Ginny. She was going to be okay. She had to be okay._ He raced along with Neville, until he finally reached the room where Madam Pomfrey gave the best medical care a student could hope to receive. His eyes scoured the beds as he paced along looking for Ginny's flaming red locks. Instead, he found her standing, along with McGonagall and Luna, fussing over somebody who lay on one of the beds. He blinked. He'd been about to heave a sigh of relief, when he saw who it was.

Alexa.

She was awake though, thank Godric, but she was shivering, and her legs seemed to be shaking. Ginny turned around and saw him, looking a bit surprised. She nodded at him in acknowledgment, then after murmuring a quick, "I'll be back," to McGonagall, she took Harry aside.

"She hit her head on one of the taps in the bathroom and fell unconscious into the water in the bathtub. If she hadn't screamed out in pain, I would have had no idea something was wrong and she would have – we would have lost her, Harry."

Harry stroked Ginny's head absently. He didn't tell her how afraid he'd been that she'd be the one lying lifelessly on the bed. Then he heard a low whimper and turned to Alexa again. Madam Pomfrey was administering a Healing Potion, and within moments, as Harry, McGonagall, Ginny, Luna and Neville anxiously looked on, Alexa returned to normal.

Ginny lunged at her, muttering how terrified and scared and worried she'd been, while the others collectively heaved a sigh of relief, McGonagall holding back a single tear from trickling down her cheek. She peered down at the girls through her glasses, then silently gave Madam Pomfrey her thanks.

She caressed Alexa's face affectionately, then seriously said, "No more bathing in the tub for you, young lady. Showers will have to be the only way. I'm going to Charm all the tubs in all the girls' bathrooms to revoke your access."

Alexa smirked. "You're – you're joking— right?"

McGonagall only shook her head, a severe expression on her face. Ginny frowned. "It was only an accident, Professor, I'm sure she'll be careful next time, right?"

The Head of Gryffindor House pursed her lips, making them as thin as possible. "If, Merlin forbid, something would have happened to her today, I hardly suppose it would have mattered very much to us if it had been an accident or otherwise, Miss Weasley. As her grandmother aunt, I only have her best intentions in mind, as I am sure, and as I hope, you do too." Turning to Alexa, who had opened her mouth, she continued, "I see the protestations you attempt to form in your lips; save your breath, because I'm not listening to you, not this time. I've given you far too much leeway and this is what we've come to. I made a promise to your father, and I'm a woman who keeps my word, Alexa, and you are not going to be the one who changes that. And now, if you excuse me, there is urgent business I must attend to, so I trust you three to get Alexa safely to the Common Room."

And with that, she was gone.

Luna had a serene expression on her face. "She's a rather fascinating woman, that one."

* * *

Harry was on the Quidditch pitch again, with the whole team. He made sure everybody practised to the best of their ability; the first match was against Slytherin as always, and the traditional rivalry was a good enough reason to give everyone a push, but this would also be the last Quidditch match Harry ever played in school. He wanted to make it worth it, and a lot of members of his original Quidditch team planned to show up to watch him play one last time. Fred and George, Oliver Wood, Angelina Johnson. Alicia Spinnet had prior engagements which prevented her from making it to the unofficial reunion, but they'd all agreed to meet up again sometime later to catch up.

They were in the middle of a break, and Harry took a sip of water to make up for all that had been lost during the gruelling session of Quidditch. Everyone was working hard, and he'd been paying special attention to everybody's strengths and weaknesses. They were all mostly fine on that aspect, except Alexa seemed to be having trouble avoiding the Bludger. He hadn't wanted her to practise so soon after her accident in the bathroom, but she'd been adamant about it, and she'd seemed fit to play, so he'd acquiesced. He would ask Madam Hooch to look into the Bludger just in case there was a problem with it, but otherwise Alexa would only have to focus on being more careful. His mind went back to McGonagall's words at the tryouts. She'd smiled painfully when the results had been announced. He couldn't let Alexa get hurt at any cost, especially after what had already happened.

The break ended. Everybody returned to their broomsticks happily after Harry told them practice would end soon. Quidditch resumed. The players whizzed past each other, all eyes on the game.

And then it happened.

A rogue Bludger came out of nowhere, striking Alexa in the wrist. She managed to maintain her grip on her broomstick with her other hand, but it was obvious she was in excruciating pain. Play was halted, and all the team members rushed to her aid.

"It's just a broken wrist, I'll be fine!" she exclaimed through groans of pain.

" _Ferula_!" Katie Bell cast the Healing Charm, alleviating Alexa's pain in a jiffy. Everybody seemed concerned. The falls and cuts Alexa had been suffering of late in the corridors could have been written off as mere coincidences, but the rise in her debilitating accidents had gotten suspicious at this point. As the others took Alexa back to the Common Room so she could rest, Harry took the Bludger for Madam Hooch to inspect.

She muttered a string of incantations, of which Harry recognised very few. "Specialis Revelio" was one of them. Madam Hooch wiped the sweat off her brow, then frowned at Harry.

"Everything's fine, Harry. It was probably just an accident."

* * *

Nobody mentioned the "accident" to McGonagall. Alexa didn't want her to worry. At dinner time, Harry suddenly wondered how it was that the Slytherin team wasn't harassing them for the pitch, or making fun of their team. More specifically, he wondered why Malfoy hadn't been harassing them. He hadn't even seen the Slytherin King in ages. Malfoy definitely had to be Slytherin Captain, but he was nowhere on the scene. Something was definitely up. He mentioned it to the others.

Neville nodded. "I heard his mum pulled him out of school because she finally decided he was too good for this place or something. I think he transferred to Durmstrang."

Harry shrugged, remembering something similar which Malfoy had mentioned back in the fourth year. It seemed plausible enough. He turned back to his dinner, trying to ignore the fact that Neville had started a new conversation with Ginny. He saw Alexa deep in thought. She caught his eye, then quickly looked away. He decided he wouldn't press her. Besides, his mind was otherwise occupied with the fact that Neville had told Ginny a joke she found funny. She was smiling. _Huh. That was nice_ , he thought sarcastically.

His feelings for her were getting worse, becoming more and more insufferable by the day. Even Ginny had taken to blushing a lot around him, her face matching her hair, and her elbows clattering over things on the table when he was around, not unlike her behaviour in his second year. She remained unaffected, however, when she was around Neville, and this infuriated Harry to no extent, as he could conveniently forget how even he lost his proclivity to want to spend every living moment with Ginny while he was involved in a conversation with Alexa.

When Ginny began to laugh, Harry couldn't take it anymore. "I'm – I need to go to the library, last minute homework," he muttered, dashing off. He had no real purpose in there, he just had to get away from everything. He wandered by the bookshelves, his eyes taking in all the titles. He stopped at one. _Everything You Need To Know About Love Potions_ by Shina Geldana, who was a noted potion maker, the blurb at the back of the book told him. His mind went back to the WonderWitch products at Fred and George's joke shop, more specifically, the love potions. Wondering if he and Ginny had found themselves in the middle of a love potion gone wrong, he opened the book by Shina Geldana, intrigued.

An hour later, dejected, he put the book down, finding nothing of consequence. It was a very basic book, informing the reader about how to brew it, its side effects, the duration and other factual experiences. Nothing in it covered the madness that described his situation with Ginny.

Frustrated, he left the library and went to bed, hoping the next few days would bring him answers. Instead, they only brought raised eyebrows and questioning glances, including Alexa's scribbled note to him, telling him to "make the girl fall for you the proper way."

Harry gave up.

* * *

Weeks passed. It was October the 30th, the day before Halloween and the day before the first match of the Quidditch season. Gryffindor practice was in full swing. Everyone was giving it their all, and Harry was proud of them, but Alexa was still having problems dodging the Bludger, and at this point Harry was getting exasperated.

When the Bludger grazed by her broomstick, he lost his cool. He halted the game, then glared at her.

"Alexa, what is it with you and that bloody Bludger? Ever since the first practice you've been having problems with it. Everyone here had something they were struggling with, myself included. But we worked on it, we've been trying to better our game, and we've been working very very hard, so tell me why it is that every single time the Bludger gets dangerously close to someone, that person is you? It's like you don't even try! The match is _tomorrow_ , Alexa, not next year! It's going to be my last match in school, probably my last match ever if Voldemort finally gets to me this year, Godric knows I can't get lucky again. Can you please go to the corner and practice your dips and dives, Alexa? Because it's getting on my nerves now, and —"

Alexa's face hardened. Her chin had a determined set to it when she opened it to speak, but before she could, Ginny interrupted.

"Harry Potter, don't you dare go on with this rant of yours! Don't you remember your rogue Bludger in your second year? Don't you remember how you fell off your broom? Or do you just remember the part that happened later in the year when you saved my life and defeated Voldemort again and saved the day as usual?"

"I don't see how that's relevant —"

"Damn right it's relevant, don't you think it might have been charmed to target only Alexa? Did you consider that?"

"I already did, Ginny! The day her wrist broke I took the Bludger to Madam Hooch, she said nothing's wrong with it! I tried my best to get to the bottom of this but maybe —"

"But maybe it was _you_ who didn't try hard enough," said Alexa coldly, at last. "Because I've worked just as hard as the rest of you. In fact, I've probably been working harder than you lot, because none of you had a mad Bludger out for your life! Nevertheless, since my game isn't up to your standards, I'm leaving. You can get Cormac McLaggen to play. I hear he's decent. At least he can _dive_ , you know, Harry. Unlike me."

She stepped off her broom, turning to leave, while her teammates stared at each other, eyes widened. Ginny gripped her arm.

"No, Alexa. You're the best Keeper in Gryffindor, I'm not letting you go. And since _I_ am the Captain, I'm the one who gets to decide these matters. Not Harry. You're staying. Or I'm going to have to tell McGonagall about the Bludger."

Alexa winced. "You wouldn't," she whispered.

"I don't make empty threats," was the reply.

Alexa stared hard at her friend, then got back on the broom. "Fine. Let's play."

When practice finally ended, Harry, prompted by Ginny's death glares, went after Alexa to talk to her, but the dark haired girl refused to so much as look at him. He tried following her, but then she walked into McGonagall's office. He waited outside for a bit, unable to hear what transpired inside. Then Alexa"s voice could be heard yelling, "Fine, don't come then!" She walked out of the office, slamming the door. When she saw Harry, she just made a rude hand gesture and walked off in a huff.

* * *

The next morning Harry nervously ate breakfast, then met his team. As he went through all their strategies once again, Alexa nodded along, but didn't say a word to him. Then they walked into the pitch at last. It was a glorious day. Luna was the commentator, which meant it would definitely be an entertaining match.

Madam Hooch started the match, and then the game began. The Slytherin team was terrible, especially as they didn't even have Draco Malfoy on their team. Gryffindor's Chasers easily scored one after the other, and Harry knew the Snitch was somewhere under his nose. When the Slytherin Seeker stopped midair to look for the Snitch, Luna passed a comment into the microphone about Wrackspurts getting to him, cracking up the spectators. At last Harry spotted the Snitch, darted towards it, and caught it.

"GRYFFINDOR WINS!"

Harry had never felt such a rush of emotion at the end of a match. This was his last Quidditch victory. The last time that Snitch tried to slip out of his fingers. The last time —

"The Keeper is falling! Harry, I think a Bludger hit Alexa!"

Harry turned to see Luna looking at him with a stricken expression from the stands. He looked at the goal posts and Alexa had indeed fallen off her broom. She was hurtling down hundreds of feet, and everyone froze. Harry's heart went still. He contemplated swooping down on his broomstick to pick her up, but that was too risky. Then he remembered the spell Dumbledore had cast in his third year when he'd fallen off his broom because of the Dementors.

"ARRESTO MOMENTUM!"

And then it was like Alexa began to peacefully float in her downward descent. She touched down on the ground like it was a bed of clouds, and closed her eyes.

She was taken to the Hospital Wing, where Madam Pomfrey pursed her lips when she saw Alexa again. A few quick tests were done, which determined that she was fine, and everyone was shunted out of the room. McGonagall remained, gently stroking Alexa's hair with one hand, holding her hand in her other. Harry was again reminded of McGonagall's words at the tryouts.

"I'll quit the team, Min,"

"Now you understand?"

Alexa nodded. Harry frowned.

"No! I mean, no – you were brilliant today! I'm sorry for everything I said! No really! Listen – I honestly apologise for it all! You don't need to go anywhere! You don't need to quit anything! You'll be fine! Professor – say something!"

"Harry, it's dangerous for me. And you won't always be there to save me. Thank you for today, but Harry —"

"It's dangerous for everybody! It's part of the thrill! Don't let one fall knock you down! Professor – tell her she's being ridiculous!"

"I'm afraid I cannot, Mister Potter. Alexa, I think it is time you told him."

"Told me what?"

"It's a long story, Harry. Later. I promise."

* * *

It was a Hogsmeade weekend. Harry couldn't wait. He got dressed and waited for the others at Honeydukes, where they always met. Then he saw Alexa.

She was wearing a baggy sweater and tight jeans, with a big scarf, and looked really cute. She looked like she was wearing a little makeup too, nothing dramatic, just a little mascara and tinted lip balm. She smiled at Harry, then said, "It'll be just us today, Harry. Would you fancy a walk?"

"Where are the others?"

"Ginny's on a date, and —"

"A date? With _Neville_?"

"Heh no, with Dean."

" _Dean_?!"

Alexa nodded. "Neville's staying back to work with Professor Sprout. He said he has some special project."

Harry just shrugged, and they began to walk together. The November air was chilly, and winter was approaching. Their cheeks were cold, and Harry liked it that way. He asked Alexa if she wanted him to cast a Warming Spell on her, but apparently she liked the cold too. After they'd walked a while, looked in a few stores, and indulged in small talk and exclamations of "I have to get that!", Alexa looked up at Harry.

"Are you ready for story time?"

"Are you ready to tell me?"

She smiled. "Do you know about Guardian Angels? The magical ones, not the Muggle concept."

Harry shook his head, and Alexa prepared to tell him everything about it. There was a lot to say, and she was sure he would have many questions.

"Okay. Let me explain first. Questions later.

The Guardian Angel bond is the strongest magical bond. It involves two people, one of whom is the Guardian, the other person being the Guarded. Most often, except in very rare cases, a Guarded is also someone else's Guardian. But it is common for a Guarded to feel closer to their Guardian than vice versa. This Bond is characterised by intense affection, longing, and compassion. You need to be fifteen to start becoming a Guardian, and at sixteen, you are a fully developed Guardian. That's when these intense, incomprehensible feelings develop, at fifteen - sixteen. Parents act as Guardians till we are fifteen, after which there is residual Guardianship till age sixteen, after which there is no role for the parents to play.

The main purpose of a Guardian Angel Bond, or a GA Bond, is that as long as the Guardian is alive, the Guarded cannot die. Not hunger, not murder, not suicide itself can kill the Guarded. The only way a GA Bond can be broken is if the Guardian's soul is killed —either when they kill somebody else, or if Dark Magic is pumped into their very veins. And when one of the members dies, the other is filled with intense guilt and remorse. This usually applies to the Guardian, but can also affect the Guarded, because there is a feeling of failure. Once a Guardian dies, the Guarded is in immense mortal danger. To compensate for all the times they could have died but didn't, because of the Bond, the fates try to balance out things by putting death at every doorstep for the Guardian-less Guarded, known as the Unguarded. Because I lost my Guardian a few months ago, I've been having lots of "accidents" —the Death Eaters at my house, accidentally apparating to Malfoy Manor, setting Min's house on fire, almost drowning in the bathtub, hurting my wrist, falling off my broom – even all those times I tripped in the corridors!

Sometimes, and this is slightly rare, two people are each other's Guardian Angels. This is known as a Bonded Pair. Because neither can die while the other survives, a Bonded Pair is given the gift of immortality, something not many choose. A Bonded Pair can only be broken by suicide of one of the members. However, if a Bonded Pair's members choose to have children together, that child will remain alive forever, and nothing can kill them —they will wander the planet till the universe itself crumbles into ash. There are no officially known Immortals.

The whole world is connected by the GA Bond, beginning and ending with Muggles. Yes, Harry, Muggles experience it too. To promote harmony among the magical and non magical, the Bonds exist in such a fashion that the first Guardian, known as the Source, and the last Guarded, are Muggles. That's why during every Wizarding War, the Muggles are killed first, so that more wizards can be killed because a lot of wizards have Muggles as their Guardians.

Orthodox Wizarding families like to use the GA Bond theory to explain homosexuality, or extra marital affairs, or romantic relations between Muggles and magical people. While the first two are not quite true, and use the GA Bond theory as excuses, the latter is somewhat related, often occurring due to a magical person being unaware of who their GA Bond is with.

Earlier, a record of all GA Bonds was maintained in the Ministry, but after Voldemort misused it to kill the maximum number of people in the First Wizarding War, all prior records have been destroyed and no new ones are recorded.

Harry, the GA Bond is an essential part of puberty for magical teenagers, and something teenagers rarely learn about from reliable sources. But you can be secure in the knowledge that everything I told you is what I've learned from the books that were part of my mother's research on the GA Bond theory, and have been thoroughly corroborated by Min as well."

When she finished talking at last, Harry tried to just process everything he'd heard. It was almost too much to take at once. They had stopped outside Madam Puddifoot's tea house, although neither had any intention of going in. Harry looked through the window, and saw something that made him frown ever so slightly. Then he blinked in realisation.

"Does this mean what I think it means?"

* * *

 **A/N: let me know what you think in the reviews!**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: This is a bit shorter than the previous chapters, but reveals more. Hope you like it!**

 **Disclaimer: anything you recognise belongs to JKR**

* * *

 **Chapter Seven**

Alexa's gaze followed Harry's. She saw what his eyes sought out.

"How do we know for sure who our Guardian is? Is there any way?"

"You know when you know. When it feels _right._ It's a lot like falling in love romantically, but it's nothing like romantic love. In fact, it's like no other bond, not a familial bond, nor a platonic one. It's a bond of its own category. However, sometimes people do have a tough time discovering their Guardian or their Guarded. It could be they don't know about the GA Bond theory. Or their Partner is a traditional enemy. Or it's someone they've always been close to, so they feel their Bond and the feelings that come with it are a natural part of the relationship."

"So if I'm in a Bond with someone, does it mean there are absolutely no romantic feelings?"

"Not necessarily. Your father, for example, was your mother's Guardian, and his feelings for her were legendary."

Harry's face lit up, the smile reaching his eyes. "My dad was my Mum's Guardian?"

"Yep. But that didn't change his feelings for her, it just made him fall for her even more. I'm not sure if you know this Harry, but your Dad, when he was younger, he was a bit of a – bully. But then when he was sixteen and he realised he was Lily's Guardian, he decided to leave his old self behind."

Harry remembered his Occlumency lessons with Snape from the previous year, and how he had had to accept that his father hadn't always been on his best behaviour. His eyes softened as he imagined his father mending his ways for the woman of his dreams. Then realisation dawned upon him.

"That night, when they – when Voldemort killed them – after my dad was killed, my mum had no chance, did she? That's why he killed my dad first? Did he know?"

Alexa nodded. "After she died, her Guardian powers were transferred to your Uncle and Aunt's place. That's why they're safe. That's why you're safe as long as you visit every summer. That's why your life has been in greater danger after you joined Hogwarts, because you were away from your Mum's protection. Your surviving the Killing Curse could have been attributed to your Mum's protection and the GA Bond theory, but if that had been the case, the Curse would never have left Voldemort's wand, would never have struck you. And yet it did, leaving you with only a scar, leaving you to remain a mystery and a messiah."

Harry just looked at her, not knowing what to say.

"Draco Malfoy was Hermione's Guardian."

Harry's eyes widened in horror at her abrupt statement. "No," he whispered.

"Yes, he was. He struggled with it. He'd always hated her, but then when he became her Guardian, he slowly began to question the way things in his family were, the beliefs he'd been raised on, the supremacy of Voldemort that he'd been brainwashed with. He resisted the change at first, he did everything he could to fight it, but eventually, he began to see the light."

Harry wondered how Alexa knew this. He asked her as much.

"Hermione told me," she replied simply. Harry frowned. They'd been best friends for five years, and yet Hermione had chosen to share this pivotal piece of information with Alexa and not him? And if she and Alexa had gotten so close, how come he'd never heard about her from his best friend before? He'd never even seen her at Dumbledore's Army meetings. Again, he voiced his doubts.

"She was afraid you and Ron would never trust Malfoy. You she knew would eventually give in, but Ron would take time and she didn't want you to have to keep secrets from him, you see. Hermione and I got closer only last year, and we got to know each other better in the DA. I was a part of it, yes, but I was always in the group Hermione taught. She didn't want to keep secrets from you, Harry, please don't be mad at her."

Harry nodded. Then his brow furrowed.

"Wait a minute. If Hermione died while Malfoy was alive, does that mean he killed somebody?"

"No Harry. When his father realised his son was no longer the boy who followed his orders, that his son was in a GA Bond with a Muggle Born, he pumped him with Dark Magic to break the Bond. It's an awful procedure, hundreds of Unforgivable Curses were cast into a vacuum room, and Malfoy was strapped to a chair and forced to stay in that room, breathing only Dark Magic, sustaining only on that. He was broken after that, and was never the same. And then Hermione – after we lost her, survivor's guilt set in because he'd failed her as her Guardian, and also because of his father's involvement. That's why he's been so morose and so off lately. That's why he's not in school anymore. Durmstrang is just an excuse; he's in St Mungo's. I saw him when we were there for Ron. He's lost everything. Not that I spoke to him, I just saw him in a ward with his mother, staring into oblivion. Harry – it was dreadful."

Harry didn't know what to say. Alexa was just bombarding him with more and more information, more and more secrets.

"So Hermione told you all this?" he asked again, trying to mask the hurt in his voice, failing.

"Yes and no," replied Alexa carefully. "She told me about most of what I just told you, but I already knew she was Malfoy's Guarded."

Harry raised an eyebrow.

"A person's Guardian and their Guarded are reflected in their aura. Aura reading is an ancient art, but a 'woolly discipline', as Hermione used to call Divination, so most people don't believe in it. However, it too, has its believers. And there are some who can't read the entire aura, but can only see the names. It is a gift passed on through each generation in a group of families, and my family is a part of it. It is passed down the females, and my mother had the gift before me. Many people even make professions out of it. One of the added benefits of this gift is that our voices have emotionally healing powers, if we use a specific decibel and pitch. That's how I calmed Ron down."

"I don't understand. If you can help people, why don't more people like you take it up as a profession? You could work as Healers, help people with depression even in the Muggle world."

"Because the effects are temporary. The only way lasting benefits can be brought about are when patients let it out, in words, or tears, or dance or anything, as long as the emotional trauma no longer resides within them. And we don't like to tell people about their Guardians and their Guardeds because, like love, an important part of the journey is finding your people, discovering them by yourself. It isn't something that can just be dished out to someone."

Harry nodded. Then he looked into Madam Puddifoot's tea house again. "And if I suspect who mine is, could you at least confirm it for me?"

"I don't see the harm in that, Harry."

He smiled. But he wasn't ready to ask her just yet. He wanted to savour the possibility, remember the emotions, the confusion, the overwhelming sensation, before he knew for good.

"I still can't believe how you know all this, Alexa."

"My Mum's diaries. She was your Dad's Guardian. Hers was a case of an absence of romantic feelings after discovering the Bond. She was his best friend's sister, she'd had a crush on your Dad for years, then it all changed when she got to know about the Bond. Sound familiar?"

Harry laughed. Then he stopped. "Best friend's sister?"

"She was Peter Pettigrew's younger sister."

At the sound of that name, Harry went still. His face hardened, and his eyes grew cold. He hadn't been his father's best friend. Not by a long shot. Not if betrayal was a part of friendship. His jaw clenched and he dug his nails into his palm to stop himself from the rage that rushed through him. He began to shake his head, walking away from Alexa.

"I hate him."

Alexa grabbed his arm, stopping him. "I know what he is, Harry! I know what he's done! The night your parents were killed, so was my Mum, just a few hours earlier. It wasn't Voldemort, like all of us thought until a few years ago. Dad never talked to us about it. He was the only one who knew what really happened that night. It was her own brother. He came home to ask her who your Dad's Guardian was, and, when he found out it was her, he – killed her. Just like that. What sort of monster kills their own sister, Harry? He ruined everything! He just killed mum, but he broke Dad too, and he took them both away from me that night. He orphaned two lives in one night. I've clenched my jaw and balled my hands into a fist because of him too. I hate him, Harry, I hate him too. Maybe the two of us have more in common than you know."

Harry bit his lip. She was looking at the ground. Then she looked up at him again and cleared her throat. "I don't want to talk about this anymore. I don't like to think about this, but Min felt you deserved to know everything."

Harry nodded. They began to walk away from Madam Puddifoot's tea house, towards The Three Broomsticks. Alexa ordered two Butterbeers, and when she returned to the table Harry had saved for them, they sipped their drinks in silence.

* * *

They were back in the castle, seated in the Common Room, trying to do their homework, but secretly caught up in what had happened during the Hogsmeade trip, each stealing glances at the other.

Then Ginny came in, kissed Dean on the cheek, thanking him for "an absolutely wonderful time", then stayed with Harry and Alexa just for a moment, to tell them about her date.

"I honestly don't understand why somebody would find Madam Puddifoot's tea house romantic! Everyone there was either eating each other's face out or feeling each other up and I never felt so utterly cheap in my whole life! 'Absolutely wonderful time', my foot, I can't see why we couldn't have just gone to The Three Broomsticks like I wanted to!"

She complained a bit about hot it had been in the tea house, and then she got up to change out of the dress that was clinging to the sweat on her body. Harry watched her leave, not feeling an ounce of the mad rush of jealousy he'd felt before. He asked Alexa how long it usually took for those confusing feelings to subside after one realised they were in a Bond; she told him just half an hour was enough. It was confirmation enough for him, but he knew he had to ask.

"It's Ginny, isn't it? She's my Guardian?"

And then Alexa nodded yes, and a smile broke out on his face. He was full of questions: did Ginny know about the Bonds, who was Ginny's Guardian, was it Neville, could he tell her she was his Guardian, and about fifty other things he wanted to know. Alexa told him to slow down, promising to talk about the Bonds with her, and that she would send Ginny to him.

Then Harry tried to go back to his books, but after realising there was too much on his mind, he put his things away and decided to go on a run. He put on his running shoes (it wasn't really necessary for a wizard, but it was a habit he'd gotten used to), and told Alexa he'd be back in a bit.

He roamed the corridors, slowly walking out of the castle, moving to the grounds. He continued to walk a bit, then saw Hagrid's hut, remembering all the times he'd visited with Ron and Hermione. He couldn't visit Hagrid today, not alone, not like this. That pang of pain reminded him of everything he'd learned that morning at Hogsmeade.

It still hurt that Hermione had kept so much from him, that Alexa could know so much about his best friend. His feet began to move faster as he tried to imagine a friendship forming between his best friend and arch enemy, as he began to realise Hermione was dead because of Lucius Malfoy. Hatred burned through him, until his old hatred of Peter Pettigrew resurfaced, as he realised that his parents weren't the only ones Wormtail had betrayed, that his family wasn't the only one Wormtail broke apart that night.

He hated Wormtail, but more than anything, he hated himself for letting that excuse of a human being escape that fateful night. Because of that one stupid act of mercy, Voldemort was back, Cedric was dead, Hermione was dead, Ron was in St Mungo's, and everybody everywhere was in grave danger. Try as he might, he could not shake off the deep seated blame he placed on himself for the bleak state of the wizarding world.

And to know that Ginny was his Guardian just added to his agony. He'd been ecstatic to hear about it before, glad to finally be rid of all the conflicting emotions, but now he realised what it truly meant for Ginny to be his Guardian. Alexa had compared Ginny to her mother, and the latter had been killed so that Voldemort could get to Harry's father, and Harry knew Ginny was now placed in graver than grave danger. Lucius Malfoy had slipped Riddle's diary between Ginny's books when she was eleven just because she was a Weasley; what would happen to her when Voldemort got to know she was the only thing that could keep Harry alive?

Harry ran a few more laps trying to rid himself of these tormenting thoughts, until exhaustion took over him. He trudged back to the castle and went straight to one of the bathrooms. It was a small one, with just two cubicles meant only for showering, and it was unisex, because, as Dumbledore used to put it, with a twinkle in his eyes, "sometimes you just really need a cold shower, and the other bathrooms can get occupied."

He was alone in the bathroom, so he took his shirt off, then picked up a fresh towel from the racks, wrapped it around his waist and took off his jeans and boxers, depositing all his articles of clothing into the laundry hamper. Then he got into the cubicle, and turned on the shower, letting the water wash over everything he felt.

When he was done, he realised how stupid he'd been. He hadn't brought any fresh clothes to change into.

He could have used a simple Summoning Charm, but didn't quite fancy the idea of having his clothes whoosh through the entire castle. So he simply cast a Drying Charm on his body (not on his hair, as he'd realised a while back that letting his hair air dry made it softer), wrapped the towel around himself and opened the door.

He was no longer alone.

The cubicle door opened to face the basins, and Alexa was in the middle of trying to wash her face. She was determinedly scrubbing her face with her hands, tiptoeing to see herself in the mirror. She looked adorable as she ended up getting water all over herself, and with water in her eyes, she grabbed at her sweater to wipe her face and get the water out. As she lifted her sweater, she ended up exposing a bit of the flesh on her back, and Harry decided he should either announce himself, or sneakily pick his clothes up from the hamper, instead of spying on her.

Both options were rendered slightly difficult by the fact that he was not wearing a shirt.

It wasn't as if he was insecure about his body; years of Quidditch had given him abs and a wide pair of shoulders, not to mention all the girls who fawned over his body. And yet, he didn't exactly feel like putting himself on display. However, before he could decide his next step, Alexa turned around.

She was rubbing her eyes, and her vision was still a little blurry, so she was downright startled to see someone in front of her. "H–Harry?" she said, questioningly. Then she opened her eyes a bit wider and blinked a few times, then, when she saw it was indeed Harry, she smiled at him. "I didn't notice you were —oh!"

Her eyes had fallen to his bare chest, smooth and hairless from a potion Fred and George had insisted he try out, free of charge. She looked at him for a long moment, then, catching herself, she shut her eyes and turned around.

Harry was mortified, but relieved he wasn't alone in his embarrassment. He was mildly amused to see Alexa blushing a bright red, shutting her eyes tighter by the minute. He rather liked her reaction to the sight of him shirtless. Nonetheless, he put on his clothes in a hurry, then cleared his throat.

"I'm – er – decent. You can open your eyes now."

She turned to face him, trying not to meet his eyes. "Right. Um, sorry."

Harry smirked slyly at her. "For what? Getting all red in the face?"

Alexa glared at him indignantly. "I was _not_ blushing!"

Harry let out a low chuckle. "Either learn to be a better liar, Alexa, or just remember to not stand in front of a mirror next time you choose to blush. Just because you can't see yourself in it doesn't mean I can't!"

She was speechless. She opened her mouth to say something, then turned to leave. He heard her race down the corridor, then, shaking his head and smiling to himself, Harry dried his towel and put it in the laundry hamper, and after checking himself in the mirror, proceeded to return to the Common Room.

When he entered, he saw Ginny and Alexa deep in conversation. He assumed Ginny was being told about Guardian Angels, so he thought it best to leave the girls alone. But then Ginny caught his eye and called him over.

"I have to tell you something."

Harry felt someone behind him. It was a nervous first year. "There's a message from Professor Dumbledore. Er – here."

Harry read it in silence, then just looked at the others in a defeated manner.

"We need to meet Dumbledore in his room. Ron's Drowned."

* * *

 **A/N: please let me know what you think in the reviews!**


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